That Which Is White
by whenfangirlsattack
Summary: On a calm and sunny day in the Black Order, everything seems to be going great, until Allen makes one grave mistake, a mistake that will reverberate through the world for ages to come. That's right, Allen Walker ran his hand through his hair. Yullen.
1. THE Question

** AN: Soooooo here is my first fanfiction ever! :D I'm so nervous right now! Anyways, since this is my first fic please be gentle with the comment review thingies! Constructive critism is always welcome, especially since I don't have a beta aaaaand though I did spell check and read over this many, many times I epically FAIL at grammar! I also tend to have a great deal of run on sentences. . .oh the shame. **

** The idea of this story just kinda came to me one night while I was dreaming.... after you read the story you are probably going to question the sorts of things I dream about. . . D8 I don't know if anyone has done this idea before, but I wouldn't be suprised if someone has. That said I'm not trying to steal your idea, I'm just fairly new to -man (why do people call it this??? and why am I calling it that if it bugs me?!) anyways I'm new and have yet to see this done, and if it has been done... well this is just my take on the idea.  
**

** Warnings: This fic is going to be Yullen and it will probably be only 2 maaaaybe 3 chapters long. Maybe. This story also contains gratuitos amounts of swearing in the second chapter courtesy of Kanda. It also contains my failed attempts at humor. **

** Disclaimer: BAHAHAHAAHAHAH AS IF! *ahem* man and all its characters are (c) of Katsura Hoshino. . . . If I owned it Yullen would be canon, Kanda would never wear a shirt, and it would only be sold to audiences 18 and older. .  
**

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Allen Walker smiled merrily as he made his way from his room to the cafeteria, the sweet aroma of Jerry's cooking already filling his senses, as he decided in his mind what he would order today. Allen was in a particularly good mood today, as he smiled and said good morning to some of the finders he happened to pass by on his way, he couldn't help but notice that everyone seemed to be in a rather pleasant mood. Finally reaching his destination without managing to get lost....more then twice, he instantly bolted to the counter where Jerry was eagerly waiting to take his order. While waiting for his order to finish the cursed boy heard his name being called and looked over towards a table to see Linali, Lavi, and off at the other end of the table Kanda. Allen happily called back and was about to wave when the smell of his meal beckoned him to turn around, drool already threatening to fall from his opened mouth. Quickly saying thank you to Jerry, Allen made his way to his friends as he balanced his precariously perched plates of food in his two arms.

Finally making it to his destination the white haired boy gently placed his food down and said a hasty but proper good morning, before he began to devour his food at a pace not quite human. Although Allen had nearly 10 times as much food as the other three put together he still managed to finish before any of them were done. Once Allen's feeding frenzy was done they all sat in relative silence aside from the quiet murmurs coming from around them and the varying sounds one hears in a cafeteria such as forks gently scraping plates, or even people chewing. None of them moved, all quite content in the stillness and quiet, all except one. Though it was hardly noticeable at first Lavi's eye began to twitch, just a little twitch but a twitch none the less. Soon however this once small twitch became rather large and noticeable, so noticeable in fact that it caught his entire company's attention. As each of them gave him their own signature looks of perplexity; Allen's being a slight tilt of his head with an innocent and curious face, Linali's a quirk of one delicate eyebrow and a slightly unnerved smile, and finally Kanda who simply stared at Lavi looking only slightly disturbed with the abnormal and more then likely unhealthy twitching and looking almost entirely pissed that this moron had the nerve to twitch in his presence. Finally, right as Allen had opened his mouth ready to question Lavi on just why his eye was convulsing, Lavi let out a loud, strangled yell,

"I CAN'T TAKE IT!! ALL THIS SILENCE IS DRIVING ME CRAZY!" Everyone in the cafeteria was shocked, various people even falling from their seats at the sudden and completely random outburst.

Silence filled the entire cafeteria then, you couldn't even hear a single person breathe. However someone must always break the silence and so Kanda did just that.

"Baka usagi..." was the first thing to be heard after the outburst, the second was the sound of a vein promptly popping in Kanda's forehead, and the third was the simultaneous sound of mugen being unsheathed and Lavi releasing a rather feminine scream he would most definitely deny later.

After finally managing to calm the infuriated Japanese teen down, and get him to put his precious mugen back in it's hilt, Allen sat back down on the table's bench with a thud. 'Well the day started peaceful at least,' thought Allen as he heaved a rather uncharacteristically large sigh. The white haired teen looked over at Lavi who was no longer twitching but looked incredibly bored. Lavi looked up catching Allen's stare and shot him a half hearted grin, which the British boy quickly returned, as he ran a hand through his white hair. And that was the end of it. The true end of the peaceful day had come, with just that one gesture, and Allen didn't even know it, not yet at least.

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A dark cold aura suddenly fell upon the cafeteria, like a thick gray fog. The redheaded bookman's single visible eye glinted dangerously as he fixed his gaze on Allen. The aforementioned moyashi instantly paled and gulped nervously. He could see the gears in Lavi's mind were spinning quickly coming up with some dastardly thought, that Allen knew from sheer instinct he didn't actually want to know about. Within a second Allen's mind began coming up with possible escape plans and weighing their probability at being successful. He could always jump up onto the table, then grab onto the small light fixture just above it and swing himself to the next lights over until he finally reached the table about three tables down, that had a small adjacent window just above it, then he could climb through the window to his escape. No, wait that wouldn't work he wouldn't be able to reach the light fixture even if he jumped as high as he possibly could well still on the table. Damn. Well he could always pretend to randomly choke on air or have a migraine and pass out. No, he couldn't do that either because Linali would be too worried about him and that wouldn't be fair to her. OR! He could try running around in circles like a mad man, yelling random things like the name of various shampoo companies. That would definitely take Lavi's mind off of whatever this was...but only for a moment, and BaKanda would never let him live it down.... No, that would be a lose, lose situatio-

"Ne, Moyashi-chan..."

Unfortunately Allen's thoughts were cut short as Lavi had finished his thought process and had called out to him. He had run out of time. He was a dead man now. Allen begrudgingly turned his head to face Lavi once more, and was met with a disturbing sight. Lavi's face appeared completely normal. From experience the British boy knew that this was one of the worst possible signs, whatever thought that Lavi had, had was obviously truly horrid. The bookman jr. only ever acted like nothing was wrong when he was about to say or do something that had the potential to be emotionally crippling. He would act normal in an attempt to calm down and lower the guards of his victim. Allen swallowed thickly and took several, what he hoped were unnoticeable, deep breaths.

"Y-yes, Lavi?" Allen finally stuttered out, daring to look around the table at his other friends, to gage their reactions and check to see if he was just perhaps overreacting. He looked first to Linanli who had looked away in what he assumed was a mixture of respect for the dead (or soon to be) and dread. That definitely wasn't a good sign, Allen thought as he quickly placed his gaze on Kanda. However if he thought that Linali's reaction seemed bad it was nothing in comparison to this. Bakanda's face truly frightened him, normally Kanda had his face set to his neutral mode of pissed off and very rarely showed any emotion but that, however at this particular moment the Japanese boy's face seemed wiped clean of any emotion. But then there were his eyes, which were widened really only a millimetre or so more then usual but Allen instantly noticed, not even bothering to question how he knew the rather stalkerish information about Kanda's regular eye size. Now thoroughly afraid Allen began emotionally preparing for whatever was about to come.

"I was just wondering...." Lavi started off, a mischievous grin now plastered to his face.

"Well, I was just thinking that...well you never go into the baths well anyone else is there, probably because you're shy of your arm I guess, so nobody really knows.....but I was just sorta curious since you see...well, Allen, your hair is white." Lavi finished off lamely leaving the statement hanging in the air. Allen knew what the bunny wanted, he wanted Allen to play along and ask what exactly Lavi wanted to know, because that way it would be a bit more fun then just coming right out and saying whatever it was he had thought of. The phrase curiousity killed the cat had never been more true as Allen couldn't help but wonder where this was going, and since he figured Lavi would ask anyway he figured he might as well get it over with as soon as possible and just give in.

"Yeah, my hair is white, s-so....?" Allen trailed off still wondering what his hair colour could have to do with anything. Lavi smiled devilishly now, ready to release the final blow.

"Well, if the hair on your head is white.... what about the hair on the _rest _of your body?" During the sentence Lavi gestured with his hands down his body and at the word 'rest' he pointed not so subtly at his crotch.  


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**AN: I love that the last line of my first ever fanfics chapter is 'crotch' it's pretty epic. Also the part where Allen considers running around in circles screaming out shampoo company names, I actually dreamt of that but in my dream there was this really spazztic techno music playing and there were strobe lights. . .o.O" . . .yaaaaah I'm fairly positive I need therapy. Anyhoooooos I hope you enjoyed this chapter and I'll update as soon as I can. Leave a review if ya feel like it, it would be very appreciated. **

** ~byes  
**


	2. Unbuttoned

**AN: Oh my god THANK YOU!! everyone who read, favorited, alerted, reviewed, and anything-ed my story THANKS! you made me so happy! 8D **

**I'm sooo sorry it took me such a long time to update, well I guess technically it wasn't thaaat long but still. Also I have to warn you this chapter is really short and I don't really like it, I dunno it just feels off to me, but I really wanted to update and get this one over with becaaause I've already gotten the outline for chapter 3 done. I really want to write chapter 3 because I get to write my first Yullen action! and it shall be full of cliche goodness! :D Anyways chapter 3 should be done fairly soon so I hope you'll all stick around and read it!**

**Warnings: Kanda. Enough said. Also this is just in general kinda crude, I mean come on this is a story about Allen's pubes. (hmm it sounds a lot grosser when I say it like that... o.O")**

**Disclaimer: Nope. Go read the first chapters disclaimer if you reaaaaaally want to get the full version.  
**

_Last Time:_

_"Well, if the hair on your head is white.... what about the hair on the __rest of your body?" During the sentence Lavi gestured with his hands down his body and at the word 'rest' he pointed not so subtly at his crotch._

_

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_

"W-w-what!?" Allen spluttered, feeling incredibly embarrassed that something like that had been brought up. Although he couldn't help but think that it wasn't nearly as bad as what the red head could have asked.

"I was just thinking Moyashi-chan that nobody really knows if you're white all over or not. As friends I think that's something we can share! Am I right!?" Lavi finished giving Allen his signature grin.

"W-why do you even want to know something like...**that **anyways Lavi!? That's just gross!!!"

"Aww, come on Moyashi-chan, this sorta thing isn't that hard to answer, just be honest," Lavi said, as casually as if they were discussing the weather. Allen simply turned a darker (if that was even possible) shade of red.

As Lavi and Allen argued back and forth, Lenalee pondered on a way to get Lavi off Allen's back and end this argument. Though Lenalee was now very curious as to what the answer was, she thought it was far too cruel to make Allen-kun share that kind of information in the middle of the cafeteria where the majority of the Order's staff were currently eating, or had been eating at one point, now they were just listening to the current conversation between Allen and Lavi. Lenalee had to help him out, even if that meant postponing hearing Allen's answer. She would, of course, find out. She would find out rather soon as a matter of fact, however her approach would be entirely different then Lavi's. Oh yes, she would go about it in a more well planned, slightly more manipulative, way. She would just go to Allen's room later and ask him, ever so nicely of course, to tell her the truth. If of course Allen had any issues with telling her. . .well Lenalee might just have to go tell her brother that, while alone in Allen's room, Allen had tried to, 'taint her sacred and precious innocence,' Komui's words not hers. Lenalee smiled deviously at this thought. Oh she would get her answers alright. Lenalee Lee, **always **got her answers.

Lenalee was still lost in her musings, when a sudden, unnaturally high pitched , 'eep!' brought the Chinese exorcist back to reality. Lenalee looked over just in time to see Lavi with one hand on the waistband of Allen's pants and the other doing its very best to deflect Allen's flailing fists.

"Come on Allen, just let me take a quick peek. I promise I won't tell anyone!" The bookman junior tried his best to sound persuading but apparently it had no effect on Allen.

"NO! Lavi, I am not going to allow you to look down my pants!" Allen spluttered his face now inventing new shades of red not yet seen before by the human eye.

"Aww, come on Moyashi-chan just a little glance down the-"

**BAM!**

The harsh noise resonated around the cafeteria for what seemed like an eternity, before finally deciding to echo into a desolate silence.

Slowly breaking out of the stunned stupor, people turned their heads to the source of the sudden noise, only to realize that it was caused by a certain exorcist slamming his hands down on the table in front of him. Before the split second it took to process this information in its entirety, the commanding and more than slightly irate voice of one Kanda Yuu cut through the air.

"Lavi," the said redhead gulped, his hand still frozen in place, holding onto the zipper of Allen's now unbuttoned pants. It was never a good sign when Kanda called him by his given name when angry. Kanda continued voice barely above a hoarse whisper, causing everyone to lean in closer to hear him, and hold their breath in anticipation.

"I realize that you have your heart set on defiling the Moyashi right here and now, however," Lavi gulped _and_ shivered, "**I** was quite looking forward to eating the remainder of my fucking breakfast in peace!" Kanda's voice was beginning to rise in volume, and he had slowly fixed his, 'you're-about-to-get-murdered-and-don't-you-even-bother-trying-to-run-because-I-will-find-you-no-matter-where-you-try-and-hide,' look on Lavi.

"As much as I love watching Moyashi get half raped in the middle of the very public cafeteria first thing in the morning, and as much as I adore listening to conversations about the moron's god damn pubic hair whilst I put food on my empty stomach, I don't. I don't enjoy it at all. I detest it. As a matter of fact it makes me feel like I'm going to fucking gag." This time Lavi gulped, shivered, _and_ turned ghostly white, as he saw Kanda's hand rest tensely on the hilt of mugen, just waiting to unsheath it and unleash his anger in a very brutal and bloody way. Kanda's voice had now reached the level of shouting and had each person in the cafeteria frozen and completely petrified in their spot. Lavi however, though the bookman in training and apparently very smart, had a severe brain malfunction at this very moment and decided that it would be smart to taunt Kanda as opposed to even bothering to try to reason with him.

"Are you sure you're not just upset because you want to be the one doing the defiling and raping, Yuu?" Apparently Lavi did indeed have a death wish, a very large one at that.

Everyone in the cafeteria drew a collective gasp at what the redhead had just said. Surely he would not live, they all thought, and if Kanda's face was anything to go by, they were all right. Kanda's face had taken on a new look, it was different from the angry, ready to rip someones head off look he had, had a moment ago, the Japanese exorcist's face now was simply smirking. The only thing on his face that gave away his clear intent on killing Lavi, was his eyes. Kanda's eyes had turned coal black and were shining with a murderous glint, which is technically impossible considering Kanda has blue eyes and eyes can't actually shine, or give off 'glints' for that matter, but this is Kanda Yuu we're talking about and he, quite simply, defies all logic.

Lavi's gaze was now fixed on Kanda's eerily grinning face, as he realized his very potentially fatal mistake. Instantly Lavi started spouting random apologies and compliments to the Japanese teen, but they were all for not, for in the midst of Lavi's apologies Kanda said a number.

"3"

". . .Yuu what the hell are you doing?" Kanda's smirk merely got wider.

"2" Kanda unsheathed mugen for the second time that day. And Lavi began to wonder if perhaps he should start running, but he wasn't sure just yet.

All this time Lenalee had still been pondering on a way to free Allen from Lavi. Suddenly Lenalee inhaled sharply, as an idea struck her. An idea that would surely appeal to both Lavi and Kanda. An idea that would quickly catch and hold both of their attention, then again it would probably appeal to Allen as well. . .hmmm what to do, what to do. Well if Allen-kun were expecting something then perhaps he would know to run. Lenalee looked over to Allen who was still looking desperately for a way to get away from Lavi's still iron-like grip. Allen and Lenalee's eyes locked quickly and the Chinese girl gave Allen a very meaningful look, Allen merely looked at her confused as an expression of perplexity painted over his face. Lenalee nearly face palmed but instead gave a quick jerk of her head to the door, this time a small amount of understanding sparked in the British teens eyes and he gave a small affirmative nod.

"Heheh. . .w-why are you counting, Yuu-chan?" Lavi swallowed thickly in nervousness. Kanda just arranged himself in his fighting stance, his smirk turning to a full fledged grin. Just as he was opening his mouth to say the number one, a loud shout was heard.

"OH MY GOD!" Lenalee pointed in a random direction as everyone, including Lavi and Kanda turned to look. It was at this moment that Lavi let go of Allen. The white haired youth slowly inched toward the door making a stealthy break for it. Lenalee smiled, and let him make his get away. She would get to him later, and then he would have nowhere to run. And with that thought she released the final weapon in her arsonal, that's right Lenalee yelled,

"GAY SEX!"

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**AN: YAY! Chapter 2 is done! Well reading over it the second time I like it a bit more. . .still not very much though. Well last chapter ended with crotch this chapter ended with gay sex. . .i wonder if I'll be able to keep this up in the third chappie. I don't actually like the way the last paragraph is written but I had to do it like that in order to get GAY SEX as the last line, 'twas a small sacrifice. XD The most embarassing thing happened to me, just yesterday, I fell asleep during class and I dreamt of the ending where Lenalee yells Gay sex. Needless to say when I woke up I instantly said, OH MY GOD. . .GAY SEX!! How could I not have thought of this before!!!!!" . . .my (heavily catholic) teacher sent me to the office. That's not the number one most embarassing thing that's ever happened to me buuuuut this one is pretty high on the list.  
**

**Anyways reviews are always appreciated. I really hope this chapter didn't disappoint anyone! And if it did. . .weeell don't worry 'cuz chapter 3 will be better. . .i hope.**

**~byes  
**


	3. When You Shag

**AN: Ugh, I don't like this. It feels too rushed. *sigh* oh well this is my first time ever writing a kiss scene so I guess I'll get better with practice. . .well I sure hope I get better. . . DX  
**

**Also there is some sad news. . .I killed Link. I know, I deserve to die. I absolutely love Link yet I basically made him go hang himself in an emo corner. The reason for this is basically because I completely forgot to write him into the story. . .*gets shot* So I'm just going to go on with the story pretending Link is no longer following Allen around. . .even though Allen still has the fourteenth. . .ugh I fail epically at life.**

**And yet another note! This chapter is really long! 8D Well not really long but it is longer than the other two put together! As a matter of fact it is nearly double the amount of the other two put together (minus the Authors notes)! In other words I am very indecisive! 8D Well not really I actually have a tendency to write really long things but since I was just getting a feel for the whole fanfiction thing I guess I was too nervous to actually write lots. . .(does that even make sense!!?) **

**Warnings: YULLEN in otherwords boyxboy!!!!!1 If you don't like it please do me a favour and skip it! I really don't want flames!!!!!!!! Also there is some swearing but nothing too intense.**

**Disclaimer: Nope. **

**Alright now that my huge frigging Authors note is done, ENJOY! 8D**

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_Last Time_. . .

_"OH MY GOD!" Lenalee pointed in a random direction as everyone, including Lavi and Kanda turned to look. It was at this moment that Lavi let go of Allen. The white haired youth slowly inched toward the door making a stealthy break for it. Lenalee smiled, and let him make his get away. She would get to him later, and then he would have nowhere to run. And with that thought she released the final weapon in her arsenal, that's right Lenalee yelled,_

_"GAY SEX!"_

. . .

Allen slowly inched his way through the slightly ajar door while everyone looked the other way to try and see the aforementioned gay sex. After making his way through the door Allen ran, he ran the fastest he ever had in his life, well okay, maybe not **the **fastest he'd ever run but he ran pretty damn fast for such a short little guy. Especially when, after the excitement about the gay sex had worn down, Lavi called out Allen's name. The British exorcist knew then that the hunt had begun and it was now that he ran, literally, the fastest he ever had.

Allen ran for approximately a good 2 hours. He ran up and down long hallways, decorated with creepy paintings of dead people. He climbed and descended stairs, all of which had a different wallpaper plastered on the walls, each one more tacky than the one previous. He even found a secret pathway within a crawl space below one of the many sets of stairs, with mice and rats crawling rampantly around it. Finally, however he slowed down when he reached a level of the basement in the new headquarters that he was sure had not actually been discovered by anyone in the Order as of yet. It was here that Allen decided he could probably relax his aching muscles. After awhile his eyes adjusted a fair amount to the dark room, just enough for him to be able to make out the shape of a lamp. Walking cautiously over to the lamp the white haired exorcist fumbled around for a few minutes before finding the switch and turning the light on. The lamp wasn't overly bright but at least he could now see around the rather small room. It looked as though it had once been someones study, a place to escape from others and . . .well basically be a hermit-like loner. 1) The room had a long desk with various papers and pens strewn across it. There was also a small couch with a very old, albeit comfy looking chair in front of it, and on the wall adjacent to the couch there were three tall bookshelves filled to the rim with books and a few nic-nacs. Allen walked hesitantly to the couch, noticing once he got there that there was a rather thick film of dust covering it. The room had obviously not been occupied in some time, which would normally make a small dimly lit room, hidden away in the basement of a huge and ancient building seem even creepier, yet somehow this room seemed cozy, as though it were filled with some pleasant and calm memories. That thought in mind the British teen used his hand to quickly swipe the dust away and sit sideways on the couch, his back to the arm rest as opposed to the cushiony back, so that he was facing towards the dark wooden bookshelves. As Allen slowly released the tension in his body one muscle at a time, he slid further down the couch until he was finally laying down with his head now resting against the rather comfy armrest. Within seconds Allen Walker fell into a very deep dreamless sleep.

~~~~~~oOo~~~~~~

When Allen woke up it was roughly 2am, he gave a lazy stretch as he recalled the whirlwind events of the day that had originally started off peaceful. Suddenly in the middle of his musings Allen's stomach gave a monstrous growl reminding him that he hadn't eaten in hours, in fact he had skipped both lunch aaaaand dinner! And that wasn't even including the 'small' snacks he usually had in between. The cursed boy decided it would probably be fairly safe by now, so he left his hideout in search of the kitchen where he would indulge in a nice midnight (actually 2am) snack.

After 37.4 minutes (give or take a few milliseconds) of walking around in what seemed like circles Allen finally found his way to the kitchen. Just as he was about to walk through the doorway he abruptly stopped. He was back at the scene of the crime, where his problem had initially occurred. Allen gulped, and licked his suddenly dry lips. What if Lavi had waited there all night, knowing that Allen would have to eat sometime! What if the entire Black Order staff was waiting just beyond those grand oak doors! All of them there, ready and anxiously waiting to hear Allen's dark secret, the secret that Allen had worked very hard to keep to himself!! What if-

"GROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWLLLLL!!!!!!"Allen's stomach had apparently had enough of Allen's panicked ramblings and had taken control. Allen sighed, once again letting his hunger win out over his common sense, so previous fears aside Allen opened the door just enough to slide his body through and cautiously made his way into the dark dining hall, before blindly stumbling into the kitchen and turning on some lights. There he set to work devouring any and all leftovers from the previous day. As Allen sat shoveling down his mountains of food his thoughts drifted back to his secret and just how much work it had been to keep it.

Back at the old headquarters it had been harder to keep his secret considering there was only the one huge communal bath. Allen had, had to bathe very early in the morning and very quickly to avoid anyone seeing him, he got caught a few times, of course, but he would always make up some lame excuse and leave, (he'd once said that he needed to leave because he needed to go and wax Timcampy as a matter of the utmost urgency) nobody ever really thought anything of it, thinking he was just self-conscious of his arm. In the new headquarters, however, it was different. Since Allen had, had to be under constant surveillance by Link, they had given him a room with his own full bathroom attached to it. Apparently there was a chance of him making a break for it and going to join the Earl and his super duper crew of people with severe skin pigmentation problems, who also needed some extreme therapy. I mean come on, who **wouldn't** want to commit treason and go join up with that cult group, you even got a cute little stigma carved into your forehead! Allen gave a snort. Anyways, he was given his own bathroom so Link would be better able to watch him go into the bathroom and hear (ew!) what he was doing in there, just in case he was talking to someone suspicious and giving away all the secrets of the Order of course (sure Link whatever you say.) Having his own bathroom and bath was nice, because he really needed the privacy, however he did, from time to time, miss soaking in the huge warm bath. There was all that room to swim around in, not to mention a huge assortment of shampoos and soaps to choose from. In a fleeting thought he couldn't help but wonder what Kanda used for his long silky hair, Lavi had once said that he used just plain soap but that couldn't possibly be true. Kanda's hair was far too soft looking to be washed with some slimy soap. Allen stopped his musings there, choosing not to delve into when exactly it was that he had examined Kanda's hair so closely and critically, he also chose to completely ignore the fact that he had referred to that BaKanda's hair as both silky and soft. Moving on to another far less confuzzling thought, he wondered if, perhaps, it would be soothing to go to the large bath and just relax as opposed to scrubbing his body as quickly as he could and getting out as fast as was humanly possible. It would probably be very nice. Then a dark thought crept into his mind , it waaas nearly 3am by now. . . surely there would be nobody in the baths. . .maybe after the food he could just go and have a little soak...

The sensible part of Allen's brain, aka the one not highly influenced by the fourteenth, screamed 'NO!' it told Allen that with his kind of luck he would definitely get caught, or worse someone might find out his secret and spread it around to everyone! But alas Allen didn't listen, as images of a warm steamy bath removed any other thoughts from his head. It would be nice to go and relax after the stressful day he'd just had, so with that in mind the white haired exorcist finished up his 'snack' and made his way to the baths.

~~~~~~~oOo~~~~~~~~

With a gentle rustle Allen's shirt fell to the ground in a soft white heap, followed by his pants and soon afterwards his undershirt, socks, shoes, and gloves. Allen paused. Next to go on the list was his boxers, they were his favorite ones, they had pictures of cute little aces of hearts all over them and a few red gambling chips 2). The British teen took several quick and nervous looks around before swiftly removing his boxers and immediately replacing them with a towel. He tightened the towel on his waist several times anxiously, making sure it securely fit, before kneeling down to fold up his clothes into a neat pile and placing them on a bench to his right. That done Allen walked, a tad more leisurely than before, towards the large shelf that contained several miscellaneous shower things. The British exorcist took his time looking at various soaps and such that he could use, his guards now dropped as the steamy air seemingly soothed his frayed nerves. Then something caught his eye at the back of the shelf, it was a small crystal bottle with a big sticker covering the actual label. Allen gently grabbed the bottle then turned it around in his hand so that he could properly see the sticker on it, it read:

'Property of Kanda Yuu, Use If You Wanna Die.' Allen started chuckling than gave a snort, typical BaKanda, however he heeded the warning on the bottle anyways, after all he did rather like his head. Allen put the bottle back in the same place he found it and did his best to make it look like it had never been disturbed. Allen gave another light laugh before reaching for a bottle of, '_Lavendar Dreams_' body wash and just as he was about to reach for his preferred shampoo the door to the baths opened. (DUN, DUN, DUN!!!!)

~~~~~~~oOo~~~~~~~~

Allen stood paralyzed in his spot, too terrified to turn around to greet the unknown person. He stood there for what seemed like hours until finally the person spoke, and in a voice Allen definitely recognized.

". . .Moyashi." It wasn't a question but a statement and the aforementioned Moyashi could just picture the way Kanda's gorgeous eyes would slant down into an accusing glare. Of course it was Kanda, Allen thought. Of all the people in the Black Order it just had to be Kanda to come and find him here.

"Oi, what the hell are you doing in here at this god forsaken hour Moyashi?" Allen twitched, why couldn't Kanda just say his name, it really wasn't that hard, just two simple syllables.

"It's Allen, BaKanda, and I could ask you the same thing." Allen replied, feeling the usual frustration the Japanese teenager always managed to evoke in him quickly rise but then vanish as he turned around to the sight of Kanda slowly peeling his shirt off as if he were a seasoned stripper. Allen's eyes got wide as inch after inch of Kanda's lightly tan skin was revealed. It wasn't until Kanda replied to Allen's comment that Allen realized Kanda hadn't actually been taking his shirt off incredibly slowly and that there actually hadn't been lewd music playing in the background to go along with it, Allen's brain had simply gone into slow-mo and provided him with music he had no doubt heard while with Cross at one point. Allen shuddered. However despite his obvious disgust with his thoughts he couldn't stop his mind from doing the same thing when Kanda began to unbutton his pants and slide them down his slim hips, revealing a pair of black boxers.

"Che, you _could _ask me the same thing but it would be fairly pointless, why should I explain myself to a moron like you. Plus, I asked you first so don't try to spin this around on me. . .Mo-ya-shi." Allen twitched yet again as the sexy images of Kanda disappeared and became realistic ones where he was simply an asshole that had enunciated the word, 'Moyashi' as though he were talking to a toddler. God this guy could get under his skin. Nobody but Kanda could unravel him like this. He would get behind the smiling facade and slowly break it from the inside out until the whole thing eventually just crumbled to the ground. Even worse was that the accuracy and rate with which he could do this was very rapidly increasing, as if he were getting better all the time, each strike more potent than the one before it. Allen subconsciously clenched his fists and ground his teeth together as he began to delve into the dark and hidden section of his thoughts without even realizing it.

"Aw, did I make the little Moyashi angry?" Apparently though Allen hadn't realized he was clenching his fists and grinding his teeth, Kanda had, and being the awesome person he was he just had to sarcastically comment on it.

Kanda stood there smirk on his face waiting for the Moyashi to bite back like he always did, but the angry response never came. Kanda's smirk began to fade, why the fuck was the moron not replying? Normally he'd make a rude comment about Kanda's hair, sometimes he even tried to punch Kanda, and on very rare occasions, when Kanda had said something that had actually offended the Moyashi, said bean sprout would pout. And if Kanda was being honest he actually thought that it was adorable. His bottom lip would jut out ever so slightly, his eyebrows would furrow, and his cheeks would puff out. It was a very rare reaction, only happening about once every 3 or 4 months, but it was very worth it. Kanda decided to try again, just in case the idiot hadn't heard him the first time.

"Oi, I said, did I make you angry Moyashi?" Kanda waited but yet again there was no reply. He looked carefully at the Moyashi who looked as though he were deep in thought/constipated. Allen had one hand cradling his chin the other arm bent across his middle, holding onto the other arms elbow, his head was tilted slightly downwards and he appeared to be staring intently at the bottom of the wall to his right. Kanda quickly averted his gaze to where the Moyashi was staring, seeing if there was anything particularly interesting there. Nope, the wall was blank. So the bean sprout _was_ ignoring him. Kanda's eye gave an involuntary twitch.

Meanwhile Allen was having a battle in his head. There was a dark voice at the back of his head, saying things that were seriously annoying and confusing to Allen. His thoughts had started out just wondering why Kanda could so easily get under his skin but Kanda was apparently a very dangerous subject in Allen's head, a subject that the British teen had done his best to ignore and never really think of. Unfortunately for Allen all the thoughts he had ignored and forced to go away, hadn't actually gone away, in fact they had just hidden themselves in the dark recesses of his mind waiting to attack. So now that Allen had very foolishly broken past the barrier he was having a severe internal battle against all the things he had chosen to keep hidden from himself. The worst part of all this was that he found himself losing. Thankfully his thoughts were very polite, they _were_ his thoughts after all, so they had chosen to, in a sense, line up and let him fight them/deal with them one at a time. Currently Allen was working on a rather big one. This enormous problem he was currently trying to work on was hell bent on convincing him that he was _defenseless_, of all things, around Kanda! Pfft, the nerve of this thought! Allen didn't like that. He didn't like it at all. He didn't like it because this thought was very smart and manipulative. But more than anything he didn't like it because this thought was right. If Kanda was the one that could best get past his facade and see the real him, then technically wouldn't it be fair to say that Kanda was the one best able to really hurt him, thus making Allen. . .defenseless. That was after all why he had the smiling mask, he had been hurt one too many times in his short lifetime and if he didn't let anyone in, then if (or '_when' _Allen's pessimistic mind supplied) they left him it wouldn't hurt quite as much. Allen shook his head to try and get rid of these dark musings that were very quickly getting out of control. The thought was quiet for a moment and Allen briefly thought he had succeeded in getting rid of it, but then it started up again even more persistent than before. Allen sighed inwardly, this was going to be a long battle.

Now, let us not forget that during Allen's little discovery/ conversation with self/ early onset stages of psychosis, he was still standing there facing Kanda. Now it would've been _one_ thing had he been just standing there for roughly 3 minutes in complete silence, however this was not the case. Allen Walker, the Destroyer of Time, was standing, eyes now closed making random hand gestures as though he were talking to someone and saying complete gibberish in reply to someone who wasn't actually there 3). Kanda also stood there, facing the Moyashi, however the Japanese swordsman was standing stock still watching rather perturbed. 'What the fuck is that idiot doing?!' he wondered and as if on cue his eye gave a rather intense twitch. Then the Moyashi gave a random outburst.

"B-but I. . .NO! That's not. . ." Silence once again fell over them as Allen's face fell into something of a pout before his skin was quickly pulled taut against his face as his lips curled back in anger and disgust.

"How dare you accuse me of that!!! . . .well what do you. . ." Allen trailed off now looking concerned and a bit like a kicked puppy. Kanda raised one eyebrow and examined the British exorcist, now becoming slightly worried (though he wouldn't ever admit it, but I'm the author so I have God like authority and I get to roam around in his head whenever I so choose.) 'So the Moyashi has finally fallen completely off his rocker. Not surprising, it was only a matter of time really.' As if to prove Kanda's thoughts right a sudden high-pitched voice cut through the air.

"WHAT!!!!?" Allen's face looked shocked and horrified for a moment before settling into a look of begrudging understanding, then changing quickly to anger once again as he began to murmur random sounds to himself rather vehemently.

Kanda decided that perhaps he should wake the bean sprout up from his weird and more than slightly creepy conversation with what Kanda assumed was himself, lest the little idiot wander so deep into his own (or was it actually his own anymore?) mind that he'd get lost and never be able to find his way out. With that the swordsman took several long strides and stopped when he was about a foot or so away from the Moyashi.

"Oi Moyashi, what are yo--"

"I'M NOT DEFENSELESS!!!!!!!!!!!" Allen's sudden outburst of severely epic proportions was punctuated with a swift albeit powerful punch to Kanda's jaw.

Kanda staggered back, eyes wide in shock. Did that little brat seriously just punch him? Though the size Kanda's eyes had stretched to in shock was impressive, it had nothing on the two saucers that were now Allen's eyes. The white-haired boys mouth was agape as he stared shell shocked at the expressions flitting across Kanda's handsome face. First was shock, then a brief, very brief, moment of confusion, then came understanding, finally Allen watched as light anger turned into a deathly rage. Allen gulped nervously and shut his eyes tight waiting for Kanda to start yelling at him, but the berating never came. The British teen peeked out through one eye cautiously, only to be met with the sight of a seemingly very calm Kanda. A very, very eerily calm Kanda. A very, very eerily calm Kanda, who had somehow managed to get himself all but a couple of inches from Allen without making a single sound.

Upon realizing that the bean sprout was now staring at him, (and hyperventilating but that's besides the point) the very, very eerily calm expression on Kanda's face evaporated into a sinister one, a predatory grin slowly slithering its way onto his face. Kanda slowly leaned downwards, his nose now practically touching Allen's as he observed the rather dark blush on the Moyashi's face

"Ne, Moyashi, whatever did you mean by 'not defenseless'?" Kanda's voice had taken on a silky tone and was just above a whisper. Allen shivered and felt his face begin to get a little red. All the thoughts that had been ganging up on him just a second ago were leaving him alone for the moment, instead opting to sit back and relax with a bag of popcorn, watching to see how the current show in front of them would unfold. With his mind otherwise unoccupied a mantra began in Allen's head and it went a little something like this, 'Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, SHIT!' and so on. Kanda apparently was getting a little impatient whilst waiting for his reply so he attempted to prompt Allen to speak. Moving his face so his mouth hovered above the bean sprouts ear he spoke.

"Well, Allen. . .?" Kanda's voice was deep and sensual, and the way he had pronounced Allen's name with a thick Japanese accent had made the British boy involuntarily shudder. It had sounded more or less like, _Aren. . . _Allen's face flushed even further. All the white haired exorcist gave as an answer to Kanda's question was a choked gurgling noise at the back of his throat, then clearly embarrassed by his inability to form coherent words let alone sentences Allen attempted to speak,

". . .Uhhhhh." Epic. Fail. Kanda pulled his head away from Allen's ear and rested his forehead against the other exorcists forehead, earning yet another gurgling splutter from the bean sprout.

"Hmm, Moyashi you appear to be blushing." Then as though it were an after thought Kanda added, "che, so much for not being defenseless." The last bit of Kanda's words seemed to wake Allen up a bit as he put his hands on Kanda's shoulders in an attempt to push him away and pulled his head away from the samurai's. Unfortunately he couldn't get the guy to budge even an inch. 'Shit, why does he have to be so strong... that bastard.'

"I am not defenseless baKanda! And I'm not blushing it's just really warm in here!" Allen shouted indignantly, hands now balled up into fists as they rested tensely on the Japanese teens shoulders.

"Che, if you're face is red because it's hot in here then how come my face isn't red either, Moyashi?" Kanda replied condescendingly as he sneered down at the younger boy albeit in a very sexy way.

Allen's mind went into overdrive as he tried to quickly come up with an excuse. Shit, why did that baKanda have to be such a jerk!

"B-because. . ." Allen paused still trying to come up with something, then under the pressure he just blurted out the first thing that came to his mind, "because I was in here longer! Obviously! Ha, you can be so stupid sometimes baKanda!" Allen silently congratulated himself on his great cunning abilities. 'Let's see that jerk make a comeback for that!' The boy smirked, there was no way Kanda could top that! Or so Allen thought. . .

"Hmm, that's an interesting theory Moyashi, however I think that the reason you blushed might have something to do with, _this_." At the word 'this' Kanda once again moved his mouth to Allen's ear and spoke directly into it, the moist air from his mouth gently warming the white haired boys ear. Allen swallowed thickly.

"Umm, n-no, I don't think that had anything to do with it. . .I-it was j-just because of the warm air. So. . .yah." Allen turned his face away hoping Kanda would suddenly go blind so he wouldn't be able to see the even brighter blush now spreading its way up his neck and onto his face.

"Che, too bad, I like it when you blush Moyashi." At that Allen whipped his face around to look at Kanda in bewilderment, then a hand swiftly grabbed his chin and forced his head to tilt upwards. That's when Allen saw the smug smirk plastered on the Japanese exorcists face. That damn bastard, he's just mocking me!!! The nerve of this guy! Going and doing all those things just so he can make fun of me!! How dare he -he . . .wait, is his face getting closer?

"Hmm, well maybe this will get you to blush then." Kanda's lips were now so close to Allen's that they lightly brushed against his while Kanda spoke. Sure enough Kanda's prediction was right and as if on cue Allen turned a lovely, and surely humanly impossible shade of red. Allen's mind went blank, before coming back with a vengeance. A thousand thoughts flooded his mind, some of which were; 'Holy shit is he about to kiss me!?' then, 'Am I seriously going to let him!?', followed by, 'Why am I not pulling back?!!!!' and after that, '. . .Oh my god. . .Kanda has blue eyes? Woah, they're gorgeous!' (lmao ADHD much!) and finally as a pair of warm lips gently pressed against his own, '. . .wow. . .wait, WHAT!!?'

Allen's personal mantra began again in his head for roughly a millisecond, 'shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT!!' Just as Allen was about to pull back and demand an explanation from the Japanese exorcist, the thoughts that had been pestering him before decided it was time to step in, so placing their imaginary popcorn down they got up (in Allen's imagination) and basically gang beat the few scattered thoughts of denial floating around in Allen's head. With the evil thoughts now in control of the situation Allen began to lose his will to end the kiss. His hands, still against Kanda's shoulders, tensely unravelled from fists, now hovering and shaking just above the Japanese man's body. Allen slowly closed his eyes and leaned forward and into the kiss ever so slightly, finally letting his hands rest rather shakily against Kanda's broad shoulders once again, his thumbs and palms sitting comfortably on the teen's collar bones. Kanda decided to take Allen's newfound willingness in the kiss as permission to deepen it. So with that thought in mind Kanda hooked a strong arm around Allen's waist and pulled the Moyashi's body flush against his own. This, of course, earned him the cliche gasp he had been looking for and the raven haired boy quickly took this oppurtunity to press his tongue into the Moyashi's mouth, before letting his tongue brush languidly against Allen's own. With that action Allen let out a light sigh and began to fight with Kanda for dominance. Both of them became lost in the kiss, so lost in fact that they didn't hear the patter of footsteps coming down the hall. Nor did they hear the door to the baths slip open, in fact it wasn't until their new and completely unnoticed visitor spoke that they broke out of their reverie.

"Oho, sorry to interupt. I've gotta pee buuuut I think i can hold it until I get to the other bathroom upstairs." The voice of the new young exorcist Timothy cut through the air and fell heavily upon them, they both quickly tore their lips apart to stare in the direction of the door just in time to see Timothy pop his head back through the door and say,

"Oh, and remember kiddies. . .when having a shag always use a bag."

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**AN: Ahhh yet another epic finishing sentence! XD Anyways I hope you all liked this more than I did. . .Please try to be nice with the comments because believe it or not I actually tried really hard with this! **

**1) Haha, I'm describing my computer room!! It looks just like that and the couch does have a shit load of dust since I always opt to sit on the computer chair.**

**2)My boyfriend used to have boxers just like these. . .then I stole them!!!!!!! Bwahahaha!! And in order to be extra inspired for the story I decided to wear them while writing!!!! YAY!!!!!**

**3)I've seriously done this. . .It was really embarassing and I probably shouldn't be admiting to it but oh well!!! **

**~byes  
**


	4. And the Towel Shall Fall

**Disclaimer: It's Katsura Hoshino's.**

**ENJOY!  
**

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_Last Time. . ._

_"Oho, sorry to interrupt. I've gotta pee buuuut I think i can hold it until I get to the other bathroom upstairs." The voice of the new young exorcist Timothy cut through the air and fell heavily upon them, they both quickly tore their lips apart to stare in the direction of the door just in time to see Timothy pop his head back through the door and say,_

_"Oh, and remember kiddies. . .when having a shag always use a bag."_

After Timothy's sage advice, both Allen and Kanda stood frozen in place. It wasn't until after Timothy shut the door, for the second time, and rather foolishly assumed he was out of the other two exorcists hearing range, that he deviously said,

"Oh just wait 'til I tell Lavi about _this_!" With that he broke into a sprint to go wake up the redheaded bookman, who just happened to be the boys newly found mentor.

Back with Allen and Kanda it looked as though not much had actually changed, they were still locked in a tight, half-naked embrace, however looks may be deceiving. Where they had once been holding each other rather passionately, they were now gripping one another as stone statues. The weight of what they had done, what had just happened, and what would happen fairly soon fell upon them. Even Kanda, who normally was able to regain his composure after only milliseconds, was left completely bewildered and shell-shocked. And if Kanda needed a minute or two to collect himself, than imagine what fate had befallen poor Allen. Surely he wouldn't fully recover for several hours. He would regain the ability to function in approximately 5 or so minutes from now, sure, but he would be functioning very minimally for several hours to come.

After the minute or so it took for Kanda to fully grasp the situation and come to terms with it, he knew it was too late. God damn that bastard usagi! Timothy had been at the Order three months now and Lavi had been away on a mission for a little over two and a half months of that. Yet somehow, during the two weeks that baka usagi and baka usagi junior had known each other, they had become a devious team. Timothy practically praised the ground Lavi walked on and heeded his every command, while Lavi appreciated the little guys flattery and very willingly took him under his wing as his own personal protegé. Kanda knew that he didn't have enough time to intercept the brat before he got to Lavi. Hmm, that left him with few options, however, to Kanda's great relief, there was an option on his weird imaginary list that was one of his personal favorites and it was; denial, with a nice dash of threatening on the side for that extra special touch and **impact**.

Kanda decided to go and find Lavi, ever so leisurely of course, because he wouldn't want to give the impression that he was nervous or anxious about the situation at hand. Yes, he would take his time walking down the halls, then once he found Lavi the two of them could. . ._negotiate_. A malicious and predatory grin spread across Kanda's face as he imagined all the wonderful _'negotiations' _he would have with the moron.

With blood lust on his mind Kanda attempted to turn to leave, apparently oblivious to the bean sprout currently clinging to him. Shit, he had almost forgotten about that. Looking down at the bean sprout he noticed that he seemed, once again, to be completely lost in his thoughts and there was a slightly traumatized expression on his face.

Ahhh, nothing like dealing with the repercussions of emotionally driven, impulsive decisions, in the freakishly early morning. And as much as Kanda liked dealing with these sorts of repercussions and owning up to his own actions, he didn't. So that is why Kanda decided to push them off to a later date. Putting his new really awesomely thought through plan, to not have a plan, in action. Kanda shook Allen.

Allen, who had been basically having an emotional breakdown in his head, was rather suddenly and rudely jostled back to reality. Upon awakening from his stupor, Allen realized what the cause of the shaking was; Kanda Yuu. The very same Kanda Yuu that Allen had just five or so minutes previously been passionately swapping spit with. Allen's face yet _again _went red with the thoughts of their . . .erm, 'encounter'. Unfortunately for Allen, Kanda was only a couple of inches from his face and thus he noticed the red hue of Allen's cheeks.

"Che, are you blushing _again _Moyashi? That seems to be quite the reoccurring theme for today." Kanda said with one eyebrow raised cockily as he gave the Moyashi a slightly mirthful and very smug smirk.

"I'm not blushing baKanda, it's just warm in he-" Allen quickly stopped himself before completing that fragment of speech. He remembered very well what had happened last time he'd given that same excuse. Allen gulped nervously, looking anywhere but Kanda's face. Kanda gave a low chuckle at the brief deja vu like moment and what sequence of events he was sure was currently replaying over and over in the bean sprout's head.

Upon hearing the brief laugh Kanda gave, Allen became indignant. The bastard had the nerve to kiss him for no apparent reason, offer absolutely no explanation afterwards, roughly shake him, and then, even after all of this, he had the audacity to _laugh_ at him?! How dare he! That stupid girly man was the reason they were in this mess in the first place! Ugh, why did that baKanda have to do something so confusing!?

For the second time that day Kanda found himself staring, rather disturbed, as the Moyashi talked/argued with himself. Kanda, having a rare moment of intelligence, remembered what had happened the last time the Moyashi had retreated into himself. The Japanese exorcist raised a hand to tentatively touch his still rather sore jaw, after wincing slightly at the brief contact he moved back a bit, just out of the reach of the beansprout. In retrospect that was probably a good decision because only a moment or so later the Moyashi came to a conclusion about his feelings. And this conclusion was, quite simply, that he, Allen Walker, did not want to come to any sort of conclusions regarding how he felt about the situation, or Kanda, for that matter. Allen was too confused, so instead of doing the sensible thing and talking to Kanda about what had happened, Allen decided to; act immature, be difficult, and really just not bother even trying to understand his emotions. In other words, Allen opted to take out his (sexual XD) frustration on Kanda, in an angry and violent way, because. . .well, Allen _is_ a guy after all and what is a male's default reaction to not understanding something? Yup, anger. And how did Allen normally like to take out his anger on Kanda? Why, with both verbal and physical fighting of course! So naturally that's just what he did.

"You _stupid_ girly man! Are you trying to mock me!? What the hell was that about!?" Allen shouted in frustration, his arms flailing about angrily.

"_What_, did you just call me midget!?" Kanda ground out through tightly clenched teeth. Allen had unfortunately made the mistake of insulting Kanda before asking questions, thus the raven haired exorcist had heard the insult only and the rest of Allen's statement had fallen on deaf ears.

"Hmph, you really are stupid, baKanda. I called you a girly man, obviously, or do you not understand what that means?" Allen asked feigning sympathy for Kanda and his supposed lack knowledge. Kanda was about to retort before he paused. A red light went off in the back of his head telling him that there was a reason that he shouldn't be fighting with the Moyashi at the moment, but he just couldn't remember in his angry state what it was. So deeming the reason unimportant he pushed it away, then proceeded with his insult to the beansprout.

"Heh, you think _I'm_ girly, have you looked in the mirror before Moyashi? Or perhaps you didn't see the way you blushed like a school girl and moaned like a whore when I kissed you. Che, you're just so _weak_, I'm fairly sure you're the feminine one." Kanda sneered, almost feeling bad for the slightly 'below the belt' insults. . .almost. Allen's face turned white in shock and shame, then red in embarrassment, and finally a purpley-red in rage.

"I do _not _look girly you bastard! And I already told you, my face was only red because of the heat in here, don't give yourself so much credit baKanda."

"That excuse is getting pretty old Moyashi and since you still haven't come up with the solution as to why my face wasn't red either than I really don't find it very believable. Although, I must say, I do find it pretty damn interesting that you didn't bother denying that you moaned like a whore and are weak. Well at least, amongst other things, you can see and admit to your faults bean sprout, that's _almost_ admirable." Kanda decided to add a small snort in after that line, to add just that extra bit of cockiness to his sarcastic bastard persona. Allen spluttered unintelligently for a second at the comment, before collecting himself.

"Pfft, you're just too cold hearted to be effected by the heat, idiot. And I'm not weak. I didn't moan like a whore either, I did protest though (no he didn't!) perhaps you just heard what you wanted to hear. . . Although, along with the fact that you _did _kiss me, now you're starting to hallucinate and see me blush and moan for you? Hmm, I'm starting to think that you might just want me to want to you, Kanda. I wonder why you would want _that _though. . . Could it be that _you _want. . ._me. . ._" Allen trailed off his hand on his chin as if he were actually thinking hard on the matter, however if the smug smirk stretched across his lips was anything to go by, he definitely wasn't.

Later Allen would probably look back on that moment and cringe knowing that it was from there that everything truly went downhill. From the moment that Kanda's lips pulled back into a snarl at what the Moyashi was so blatantly suggesting, to the moment when Kanda practically pounced on him in attack. Yup, in retrospect taunting Kanda at that moment definitely hadn't been one of his smarter decisions.

~~~~~~~~~~oOo~~~~~~~~~~

Kanda's vision had gone red and he was pissed off. No screw that, he wasn't 'pissed off' he was, really. fucking. furious. And when Kanda becomes really fucking furious he doesn't think things through (not that he does that on a normal basis anyways.) That said, he all but attacked the bean. He lunged through the air pushing the Moyashi to the ground in the process, then landed on top of him as they both skidded across the floor with the force of his attack.

After Allen recovered from the initial shock of the sudden onslaught of anger from Kanda and realized that the bastard had wasted no time in beating the shit out of him, he decided it was time to fight back. So the two began rolling around on the floor wrestling. They exchanged punches and kicks, hell even the occasional bitch slap and as they continued fighting something was happening. Something seemingly very small but something that would have a huge impact. You see, let us not forget that Kanda was only wearing boxers and Allen only a towel. A towel that he had secured around his waist rather tightly nearly 45 minutes ago. That very same towel was slowly starting to loosen, however Allen was too preoccupied with his 'battle' to realize it.

Like all fights between the very evenly matched exorcists this one ended rather quickly with them both panting and exhausted from all the physical exertion. Their fists slowed down and their kicks grew less frequent until finally they lay on the ground, Kanda on top of Allen, just panting and sweating. And once again Allen found himself staring into Kanda's dark blue eyes, his face was thankfully already red from fighting so he figured Kanda wouldn't actually be able to see him blush this time. The two lay there in their silent reverie for roughly a minute until they heard something. Unlike last time the two teenagers weren't too preoccupied kissing to hear the sound of footsteps scurrying down the hall towards the baths. Kanda and ALlen both whipped their heads in the general direction of the door before looking back at each other wide eyed.

_Fuck_. Was all Kanda could think, that was why he wasn't supposed to fight with the Moyashi, he was supposed to go 'negotiate' with Lavi. Kanda quickly and gracefully got off Allen taking several steps back. Allen also got up quickly, however the way he got up was anything but graceful. In the process of standing up on his shaky legs, Allen made a quick spin on his heel in an effort to get up and walk away in the opposite direction of Kanda.

. . .Allen pivoted quickly on his heel. In the baths. Where the floors are wet and slippery . . . So it's no wonder that Allen Walker fell flat on his ass.

Kanda's head turned to look at the Moyashi after the loud thump he had heard, only to be met with the sight of him sprawled out on the floor slightly dazed, before coming to his senses and begin to try to get up off the slick ground. It was at this moment that three things happened consecutively:

1) Allen stood up.

2) The door to the baths was swung wide open to reveal one baka usagi, with an expression on his face similar to that of a kid on Christmas morning.

3) Allen's towel had, had enough of Allen's abuse and had apparently decided to leave its current master in favor of the ground. In other words, the towel fell.

Everyone stood frozen for a moment, including Allen, who's mind had yet to fully comprehend the previous events. And then it hit him. He was currently standing, facing both Lavi and Kanda, completely. butt. naked.

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**AN: I really don't like this chapter. And what is it with me and freakishly long authors notes!? Geez! Anyways it's not beta'd so sorry for the mistakes that I'm sure were there, also I felt far too lazy to actually read this over again sooo there were even _more _mistakes.** **Anyhoo thanks for reading! Drop a review if you want! It would make me happy! Oh and about reviews I'm not sure if people want me to reply to their reviews or not! So umm I dunno if I'm supposed to or not!! I'm so confuzzled! Ok thanks again.**

**~byes  
**


	5. Like Micheal Jackson?

**AN: Heh heh..... why hello there.... erm long time no see..... *gets stabbed with spork* Well I'm sorry I was away so long I've been dealing with life, nuf said. **

**Anyways I've decided to go through and erase all the really long comments about my life in the previous chapters Authors Notes. I'm going to do this because; they're very long, for those that have read them they already know what they say and for new readers they aren't relevant because I've already uploaded the chapters after them... so what's the point, also I want to have a better understanding of what my average words per chapter/story is, because my AN's add a lot of words to each chapter. Anyways that's all, if you reeeeeally feel the need to know about my personal life (why you would want to know the intricate details of that is beyond me) But anyways if you want to know you can just PM me. Lmao nobody actually complained about my epic AN's... I just got sick of all of them. So in Ch.6 I will go back and erase the non-important stuff from this AN as well and so on and so forth. **

**Anyhoo's that was random and once again (and ironically) very long! XD Thanks for reading and again I'm sorry about the over-a-month-long-delay thingy. Heh heh ^.^" **

**Warnings: Swearing, mentions of pedophilia (but not really), mildly sexual themes, and stupidness that doesn't even make sense. ALSO what I do to ALlen in this chapter may very well not be possible or maybe it is, I'm really not an expert in that erm.... area. So I don't expect flames about how stupid it is. *BEWARE OF SHORT-CHAPTER-FUL-NESS!!!!!*  
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**Disclaimer: NO.  
**

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_Last Time..._

_Everyone stood frozen for a moment, including Allen, who's mind had yet to fully comprehend the previous events. And then it hit him. He was currently standing, facing both Lavi and Kanda, completely. Butt. Naked._

Allen Walker wished he was dead. Lavi wished he'd brought his camera. And Kanda wished he could remember how to speak, because this was seriously way too damn good to be true.

Time stood still for probably a minute or so before all hell broke loose.

"BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!" Lavi doubled over laughing, before finally falling to the ground as he gasped for breath. Even Kanda was laughing, and Allen, though traumatized, still took the time to commit the deep and rich sound to memory. After memorizing every aspect of Kanda's laugh Allen realized that perhaps he should actually attempt to cover himself.

"Ahahah!! First Yuu and Moyashi-chan make out half-naked and-and then, -snort- _this! _ Haha! This has got to be the single most great day of my life!" Allen's eyes narrowed and his bottom lip jutted out a little into a full blown pout.

"Stop laughing! It's not _that_ funny! I-it's perfectly normal!"

"Heh, you think that's normal? Shit, you're even more fucked in the head than I thought Moyashi." Though Kanda's laughing had died down, he still couldn't help the series of chuckles that escaped his lips as he took in the Moyashi's indignant and thoroughly mortified face.

"I have to agree with Yuu, Moyashi. You're 15 after all!"

"It's not my fault I'm a late bloomer-"

"Late bloomer?" Lavi interrupted, "I didn't think it was even possible for a guy to be completely bare down there at the age of 15! Heh heh, perhaps you need hormone supplements Moyashi-chan!" Allen hung his head in shame. His master had laughed at him too, although Cross had said that perhaps it was some strange side effect of his innocence.

"Che, no wonder you didn't want the idiot looking down your pants earlier. Hmm, does this mean you've just not hit puberty at all then, baka Moyashi?" Allen felt his face flush for the nth time that day. He remembered Cross wondering the same thing. His voice had started changing when he was 14 and when he was 13 he'd had that...uh, 'special' erm..._dream_.

"N-no, I have hit p-puberty. Master said it probably has something to do with my innocence..."Allen trailed off, realizing after he said it just how lame it had sounded.

"Che, wishful thinking Moyashi." Kanda smirked as he watched the Brit's eye twitch at the 'term of endearment' he had given him.

"Heh, the nickname Moyashi is even more fitting then before brat. I don't know that I'll ever be able to stop myself from calling you that." Allen's eyes narrowed dangerously,

"What is SO hard about my name! I know you can actually say it, we've both heard it. Why don't you stop being such an ass and actually try to be half decent to the person who's currently embarrassed beyond belief!" Allen exploded, he was frustrated and embarrassed, so he needed to take some of that out on someone or something and it just so happened that Kanda appeared to be more than willing.

"Che, it's not my fault you're embarrassed moron. Maybe if you got over yourself and just started taking hormone supplements I wouldn't need to call you Moyashi. And just because I can say your name doesn't mean I want to, you have **earn** that bean." Lavi watched as the two continued to banter back and forth obviously forgetting where they were and who they were with.

"It is SO your fault that I'm embarrassed! If we hadn't been fighting my towel wouldn't have loosened and _thus_ it wouldn't have fallen!!" Allen shouted indignantly, glaring daggers at Kanda.

"If you hadn't gone fucking crazy on me all of a sudden I wouldn't have started fighting with you. **THUS** it's your fault." Kanda put on a fake British accent as he said, 'thus' and gave a dramatic roll of his eyes. Allen just rubbed his temples and tried to take a new approach. So speaking slowly as if to a 5 year old he said,

"Yes, but if you hadn't **provoked** me I wouldn't have, 'gone fucking crazy' as you _so_ eloquently put it."

"How in the hell did I 'provoke' you!!? If I remember correctly it was _you_ who punched _me_ in the jaw. Technically that means that _you_ fucking started this shit brat!" Unfortunately, the last comment of Kanda's had been the last straw. Allen twitched; once, twice, three times, then took a deep breath and promptly went abso-freaking-lutely ballistic.

"_How_ did you provoke me?! _HOW_? Oh I'll tell you how baKanda!!! It might've had a little something to do with, oh I dunno, that **kiss** you ever so randomly gave me!!! And what are you 5?! Playing the '_he started it- no she started it_' game! Sometimes it amazes me how unbelievably _immature_ you can be!" Allen finished, his chest heaving and his ears/face a purpley-red in anger.

Kanda just stood there for a second, allowing his mind to register the mini rant the Moyashi had just gone on. And just as he had finished sorting his thoughts and was about to speak....He was brutally reminded that a certain baka usagi had been watching their whole fight from the side lines, taking in every minor detail and analyzing it.

". . .-snicker-. . .heh heh...Hahahah! BAHAHAHAHAH!!! So Yuu really DID kiss you then!!!!!! AHAHAHAH!!!!! I always knew it was sexual tension that got you two so hot and bothered around each other!!!!!! Oh my god this is definitely the best day of my life! If I were to die right now, I would die a happy man!!" Lavi was once again on the ground rolling around with laughter.

Allen blushed and started spluttering random excuses and Kanda muttered something about how the, 'dieing right now could be arranged.' After Lavi's laughter finally grew down though, things became deadly quiet, the three teens looking around nervously, Kanda and Allen both refusing to make eye contact with each other or Lavi. Finally however the silence was broken as Lavi's mind came to a stunning realization, and with this realization in my he shouted loud enough to wake the entire order;

"OH MY GAWD! If Moyashi-chan still hasn't hit puberty and Yuu actually kissed him, does that mean that Yuu-chan's.... a-a, PEDOPHILE!!"

* * *

**AN: Why hello thar! Now that you've read it maybe you understand what I mean with ALlen's 'condition.' I'm really not sure how this 'condition' works, but if you have any constructive-ful-ness feel free to help me with this issue, it would be appreciated! :D **

**Thanks for reading and I hope the epic ending line was enjoyed! Also I again don't like this chapter because of all the dialogue and OOC-ness but whatever!  
**

**Thanks again! Byes! 3  
**


	6. Ripped Out Of the Closet

**AN: heheh...err hello there.... *dodges flying objects* I'M SOOOORRRRRYYY!!! oh god it's been a little over a month since I last updated!**

**Anyways I really don't have any form of excuse for not having this up sooner... it's not even like I've been out at all, I've actually been home sick for the past five weeks...yes seriously. I fail pretty epically, especially considering I've been on my computer at least once a week (it's still broken!) but I've been on my iPod checking fanfiction and the journal I normally write ideas down in has been just sitting beside my bed for the past month or so... D8**

**Oh and I'm sooo sorry I forgot to reply to all the reviews!!!! EPIC FAIL! So I might just reply to them this time round but erm I might not, however I will definitely reply to the reviews of this chapter! Also a review from last chapter said I should cut down on the length of the paragraphs, well not in those words exactly, but that's how I took them! So I tried very hard to break the paragraphs up a bit more...although I forgot to do this often and I'm just not that good at that but I did put a conscious effort in! I swear!  
**

**Well since I feel bad I tried to make this chapter sorta long in compensation...but it didn't go to well, the actual story itself (not including epically long author's notes) is 3,213 words soooo that's really not that long buuut I tried right? So please enjoy this chapter, because I sure as hell don't it sounds far too all over the place for my liking I don't think it 'flows' very well...But anyways I'll let you decide how you feel about it!**

**Enjoy!  
**

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_Last Time; "OH MY GAWD! If Moyashi-chan still hasn't hit puberty and Yuu actually kissed him, does that mean that Yuu-chan's.... a-a, PEDOPHILE!!"_

Allen Walker opened his eyes slowly, his head still hazy as he took a brief and slightly blurry look around the room he was in, only to realize that it was, in fact, his. Well that was certainly a relief. Perhaps that whole ordeal had just been a very bad dream. Yes, just a very, very, _very _bad and overly disturbing dream! (Allen didn't bother asking himself why he was having dreams of Kanda kissing him, he was quite into the whole 'denial' thing.)

The white haired exorcist heaved a sigh of relief as he sat up, before giving a slight wince at a dull throbbing pain at the back of his head. Hmm....well that was odd.... Perhaps he'd just fallen off his bed in the middle of the night! Yes, of course, that was it..... Hmm...but then why was the sun setting...Allen almost laughed at himself then. Obviously he had slept overly long and incredibly deeply after hitting his head. It all made perfect sense!

However there were still two mysteries which Allen had yet to solve. The first being why his room smelt rather strongly of blood... And the second being why there were some heavy muttered curses and banging noises heard coming from his bathroom. The only semi-logical idea Allen could come up with was that he had actually banged his head _particularly _hard and was now hallucinating. Thankfully, this wasn't the case because it was at that moment that a certain black haired samurai slammed the door to his bathroom open and angrily stomped into his room, muttering about, 'stupid fucking sinks, and their stupid fucking faucets, giving me their stupid fucking sass!' Then as if only just remembering that the Moyashi was in the room he looked up and over to him, seeming to only just realize that the bean was, in fact, awake.

Allen's mouth hung open in a most unattractive manner as he took in the sight of Kanda. Kanda with his hair all mussed up, his white button up shirt stained with blood and decorated with several rips and tears, and mugen swaying precariously on his hip blood dripping from it. All in all Kanda looked like a mass murderer. An impossibly sexy mass murderer but a mass murderer nonetheless.

"Che, what are you staring at retard!?" Kanda gave Allen an immensely disdainful look, a look that said, ' the sight of your unintelligently staring face makes me want to rip my own heart from my body then stab it so that I no longer have to live in a world where you exist.' It was, truly, _quite_ the expressive look.

"You really can't understand why I'm staring at you baKanda?! First I wake up to hear you breaking apart my bathroom and swearing at it, then I see that you look like you've just murdered half the order! And you don't see why I'd look at you funny?! Your swords dripping **blood **on my floor for gods sake Kanda!" Allen looked at Kanda incredulously waiting to hear the lovely response to all of this and he a (single) response he most certainly did get.

"Che."

...

......

...........Allen's eye twitched, once, twice, three times before he spoke.

"Care to elaborate on that incredibly insightful thought, baKanda."

"Not really, but if you must know I was hunting...._**rabbit**_." The Japanese exorcist said the last word in such a menacing way Allen couldn't but shudder a little.

"...Oh god Kanda, what did you do to him?" Allen asked more than a little concerned and when he received no answer he grew even more fearful for Lavi.

"Is he still...alive?" At this Kanda smirked smugly.

"He might be. If he is I'd say he's rather unlucky, I think I'd prefer death were I in his place." At this Kanda gave a smile that Allen quickly decided was a severely creepy pedophile like smil-

Quite suddenly at the word pedophile, Allen's mind began to whirl, it delved into memories he'd much rather forget. Oh yes, Allen began to remember the rest of the events that had taken place at the baths.

_**FLASHBACK TIME!!! ITS LIKE RAPE TIME! JUST WITHOUT THE RAPE!**_

"OH MY GAWD! If Moyashi-chan still hasn't hit puberty and Yuu actually kissed him, does that mean that Yuu-chan's.... a-a, PEDOPHILE!!"

Allen's eyes went wide and he gaped like a fish for a couple seconds before Kanda snapped him out of his stunned stupor by going abso-fuckin-lutely ballistic.

"I'm not a fucking pedophile! I'm only 3 god damn years older than him! Plus it's not like I _forced _the little reject to do anything he didn't want! I swear to God I've heard enough of your stupid fucking cheese grater voice and all your creepy fucking ideas! You better get the fuck outta here before I deflate your empty fucking brain, by stabbing mugen through your bloody thick skull!" Allen once again zoned out as Kanda continued to give a very detailed description of how he was going to go about murdering Lavi. Because you see through all this completely unnecessary profanity and violent hand gestures, Allen came to the realization that Kanda's cheeks had a very light blush covering them...for probably the first (and possibly the last) time ever, Allen was seeing the Japanese man...embarrassed. The blush was very minimal mind you, so small as a matter of fact that it wouldn't have been noticeable unless you had been staring rather intently at Kanda's face, memorizing every small detail which, of course, explains why Allen had noticed.

"Heh heh oh you know you wouldn't hurt me Yuu! But I guess you have a point, I suppose _just kissing_ him wouldn't make you a pedo....buuut once you guys have sex I think you can consider yourself a full fledged creeper." The red head couldn't help but let a large pervy smile sneak onto his face as he said this. At this comment however Allen snapped out of his silent reverie for the momentous occasion of Kanda blushing and couldn't help but to become indignant.

"What do you mean_ 'once we have sex'_! You say it as though it's inevitable! Kanda and I aren't going to have sex. EVER. IT'S NOT EVEN POSSIBLE! Allen looked exasperated as he tried to explain the (foreign) concept of him and Kanda NOT having sex to Lavi. Despite Allen's best efforts however, it didn't work.

"What do you mean by it being _impossible_, Moyashi-chan?" Asked Lavi, a mirthful grin tugging at the corners of his lips as he didn't even bother trying to contain the humor he saw in all the Moyashi's words.

"Well for starters it's me and Kanda! That just wouldn't work. And secondly we're both boys, we couldn't have sex! It's just not physically possible!" Allen had started the previous statement feeling confident but as he took in Lavi and Kanda's facial expressions he began to get nervous. They were looking at him in complete shock, and he couldn't for the world of him figure out why!"

"I though you were Cross' student!?" Was all Lavi could say.

And:

"Holy shit you're an _idiot_!" Was all Kanda could say. Allen just continued to look at them dumbfounded not understanding how insulting him or reminding him of Cross was of any use to the situation. Lavi finally decided to help Allen understand a little bit more.

"You really don't know how it would work!? Didn't Cross teach you about that sort of thing? I mean living with the guy must've been like reliving **'the talk'** over and over, again and again, every day!" Lavi was laughing looking at the British boy incredulously.

"Of course he taught me about that sort of thing," Allen paused here to shudder as he relived certain traumatizing events from his past,"he taught me a lot about those sorts of...erm..._things_." Here Allen blushed.

"So he taught you the birds and the bees but he didn't teach you about the birds and the birds or the bees and the bees?"

"Well...er n-no, I suppose he didn't..." Allen trailed off, very clearly uncomfortable with the subject of conversation and not liking where it was seeming to go.

Lavi's grin suddenly grew ten-fold.

"Hmm...well that certainly won't do Moyashi-chan, you should be educated in this sort of thing! But don't you fret, your dear friend Lavi is more than willing to help you out in your time of need and teach you everything I know regarding the subject, which is quite a lot, if I do say so myself." Allen gulped nervously.

"Th-that's fine Lavi, I really don't think I'll ever use that sort of information anyways sooo... I think it's about time I go get something to eat....so I uh...really should be off..." Allen laughed nervously as he slowly began to make his way towards the lockers that held his clothes.

First step; Clear.

Second step; Clear.

Third step; Cle-**INTERCEPTED**!

Allen hadn't even made it 3 steps before Lavi had grabbed him and dragged him back. 'Oh well it was a valiant effort' Allen thought to himself as he sorrowfully accepted his fate.

"Now anyways as I was saying Moyashi, I'm going to teach you everything I know!" And teach Allen, Lavi did. He used the most descriptive speech he could, pulled diagrams out of what appeared to be thin air, used many, _**many**_ crude hand gestures, and took it upon himself to use Allen and Kanda as examples for their little discussion.

And it took all of about 2 and a half minutes for Allen to pass out.

**_END FLASHBACK!_**

"Oi, Moyashi, stop zoning out!" Kanda flicked Allen's forehead out of annoyance and successfully brought Allen back to the land of the living.

Well at least Allen knew why Kanda had beaten the shit out of Lavi and honestly, this time, he couldn't say he blamed him for taking that course of action.

"Hey umm Kanda....what exactly happened after I er...blacked out..."Allen muttered the last two words feebly and quietly, almost hoping Kanda hadn't heard him. He was after all quite embarrassed about the fact that he had passed out from sheer embarrassment well talking about sex, it made him seem quite immature. Kanda gave a snort before replying to the bean.

"Well first the baka usagi nearly pissed himself from laughing after you fainted like a little girl and then I attacked him." Kanda stated this matter of factly, with a shrug of his shoulders, as if attacking your supposed best friend were the most normal thing in the world.

"That's it...? Well how did I get in my room then and why _are_ you in my room anyways?" Allen looked at Kanda expectantly.

"Che, obviously I carried you here after attacking Lavi." Kanda rolled his eyes since this was, _apparently_, the most obvious thing in the world.

"...Then why is it already evening, we were in the baths during the freakishly early hours of the morning? ...How long were you sitting in my room covered in blood?"

"You're such an ungrateful moron Moyashi. I carried you back here after beating on Lavi a little bit, I was **far** from being done. I just took pity on you lying there looking like a retarded bean so I carried you to your room before continuing to hunt down and maim the usagi. Then afterwards there were some..._issues_...with the state Lavi was in so I decided that your room would be the last place that fucking robot would look for me." Kanda clenched his fists as he remembered the stupid bloody Komurin chasing him down the halls.

"Oh....so uh how long have you been here then?" The white haired boy asked, quite curious to find out just how long Kanda had been fighting with his bathroom sink.

"Fifteen or twenty minutes...why?" Allen snorted.

"You fought with my bathroom for twenty minutes! Haha that's sad baKanda, even for you!" Allen started laughing as Kanda's eye gave yet another surely unhealthy tick.

"First off I said _fifteen_ to twenty minutes Moyashi, why do you instantly assume the worst, and secondly I was only actually in there for about five bloody minutes, I was sitting by your bed for most of the time!" Kanda smirked triumphantly not seeming to realize that he'd just admitted to sitting by Allen's bed for a good ten, fifteen minutes. Unfortunately for Kanda, Allen didn't miss this fact and stared at him a little perturbed and embarrassed, only just noticing the chair pulled up beside his bed.

"Uh...Kanda why were you watching me sleep?" Kanda's eyes grew wide and there was a very lengthy pause before he replied.

"Che, none of your business."

"How is that none of my business, you were _watching me sleep_!" Allen said exasperated, placing his hands on his hips (in a completely UN-feminine way, Allen would like to remind you, thank you very much!) Kanda simply rolled his eyes, folding his arms across his chest.

"Why does it matter it's not like you actually mind." The Japanese man looked immensely smug as the bean sprout turned red.

"What do you mean 'it's not like I actually mind'! Why would you think something stupid like that, of course I mind being watched while I sleep!"

"Why would you mind me watching you as you sleep if you don't mind when I kiss you?"

"I-I do so mind when you kiss me! I had no say in the matter you just came at me completely randomly! Don't you dare turn this around on me!"

"If you didn't like it why'd you kiss back moron?" Kanda looked down at Allen condescendingly as if to say, try to make up an excuse for _that_.

"Uh...well, it-it's not...just...Oh _SHUT UP_!" Allen couldn't help but snap when Kanda started laughing lightly.

"That's what I thought. Now I'm gonna go and wash all this fuckin' rabbit blood off me in my bathroom- which actually works. Then I'll be back and we can _discuss_ this a little more." Kanda flashed Allen one last sexy grin, letting Allen know just what kind of 'discussing' he had in mind, before he opened the door and walked out leaving a flabbergasted Moyashi alone to think.

~~~~~o~~~~~~o~~~~~~O~~~~~~O~~~~~~~O~~~~~~~o~~~~~~~o~~~~~~

Allen Walker flopped down on his bed feeling thoroughly exhausted. Kanda had left nearly 5 minutes ago and he had just stood there having yet another debate with his mind. Before finally collapsing onto his bed to have an intense internal conversation.

One thing Allen was sure of however, was that he really wasn't sure of anything anymore. He had been under the perception that Kanda hated or at the very least greatly disliked him before. Sure he had always wanted the other exorcist to like him more but...this wasn't exactly what he had in mind. The most mind boggling part however was that, though he was shocked and hadn't ever imagined something like this would come to be, he couldn't say he minded. As a matter of fact he more than didn't mind, he liked it, a lot.

The white haired exorcist rolled over onto his stomach and smothered his face in his pillow before letting loose a stifled groan. His brain hurt from all this thinking, a person could only deal with so many revelations in a day.

Ugh, could it be that he...actually _liked_ Kanda?

When the voices in his brain snickered and all but screamed yes he gave a groan/whine. He didn't want to like Kanda! Kanda was an ass, in every definition of the word...well except the literal definition...although he sure did have a sexy ass...

'Bloody Hell,' Allen thought to himself, 'I really do like Kanda...why else would I notice his immensely well defined ass... and why else would I think of it as an _**immensely **well defined ass!_?'

But why did it have to be Kanda of all people to like him. _Kanda_! For Gods sake! The man who tormented him every chance he got, calling him Moyashi and other degrading names, always tripping him in the halls, always staring at him to make him feel uncomfortable... hmm, well perhaps Kanda hadn't been staring at him just to make him feel uncomfortable, heh Allen couldn't help but blush here... But regardless, baKanda picked fights with him every chance he got so it didn't really make sense that he would like him...

But he did, was all Allen could think. And now, Allen was starting to think that perhaps he kinda, sorta, maybe actually liked that baKanda too.

Now that Allen seemed to have come to some form of terms with his feelings for the Japanese teen, the voices in his head decided to throw yet another curve ball at Allen, something they were actually quite amazed he hadn't somehow noticed as of yet.

Right before this thought struck him however, it just so happens that a certain Chinese exorcist had made her way to his room and was standing just outside his door hand slowly descending upon the handle, ready to hear the answer to the question Lavi had asked during breakfast the day before. Linalee had looked everywhere for Allen over the past two days but couldn't find him. Then after the incident between Lavi and Kanda, Linalee's womens intuition had kicked in and she knew something was suspicious. Sure enough she had been right as she watched Kanda walk out of Allen's room with a very pervy expression on his ridiculously handsome face. Linalee waited a few minutes before walking to Allen's door ready to get her answers.

Now back with Allen and his curve ball thought, well, you see, it was just hitting him.

His mind whirled with the concept of liking Kanda, thoughts running rampant everywhere. One of these rampant thoughts was saying something along the lines of, 'get over it already, you like the guy.' And Allen froze.

You like the _guy_... The **_guy_**....

Bloody hell! Kanda was a **GUY**! Allen's eyes flashed open going freakishly wide, as he felt himself literally have a mini heart attack.

How had he not bothered to notice this before! Kanda was a male, a man, a dude, a guy, he had a DICK! Holy shit, holy shit, holy shit, holy shit....

Allen delved deeper into this thought and asked himself (though he regretted it immediately) 'Do I mind?' and Allen promptly began hyperventilating. Then he started choking on his own saliva when he realized that though Kanda was a guy, he really did still like him. He had noticed Kanda was a guy before, of course, he'd even made a comment about how him and Kanda having sex was impossible because of this fact in the baths and that comment had lead to an emotionally scarring conversation! But for some reason when calculating whether or not he liked Kanda he hadn't even thought to take something like that into account! It was like it didn't bother him...

It was like it didn't bother him that he was a _male_. It didn't bother him that Kanda was a male... and if Kanda was indeed a male and Allen was a male and Allen did in fact like Kanda then wouldn't that mean that...

And then, because somebody up there must really hate Allen, Linalee opened the door as Allen simultaneously shot up in his bed and shouted;

"Oh my god...I'M GAY!?"

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**AN: Well there we have it! This epic last line isn't that epic but oh well it's still pretty good and I thought this was the best place to end this chapter.**

**I hope you enjoyed it and if not well...that's very sad for you.**

**Please review they make me immensely happy! **

**~byes  
**


	7. Fish Analogies Always Make Things Better

**AN: Why hello again! How are all of you? Good? Well even if you're not I'm going to pretend that you are doing good so deal with it!**

**Anyways here's chapter seven it's not very good so I'm sorry also it's very short and sort of a filler chapter! BUT it was necessary and it was a little bit too long to be a part of what's now going to be chapter eight, that and it really just didn't fit with the idea I have for the next chapter....then of course there was also the matter of the last line....and well I just couldn't find any other good place to have a line of this ones ending line caliber sooo I really did have to cut it off there, although I must say I'm once again not very impressed with this chapters ending line but then again I never really am. XD**

**MOST IMPORTANT OF ALL!!! THANK YOU REVIEWERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Holy glgjaeghkobi nkg Oh MY GOD over happiness!!!!!!!!!!!! thank you for giving me TWENTY ONE! Reviews for chapter six alone and then several more during this period in time for some of the other chapters!! Thank you sooo much! Also I tried to reply to all the chapter six reviews, so I hope I did! I don't believe I replied to the reviews for the other chapters that I got though so I am sorry but thank you anyways I was soo happy! **

**Disclaimer (that I most definitely haven't forgotten about for four or so chapters) I DON'T OWN IT!  
**

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_Last Time:_

_And then, because somebody up there must really hate Allen, Lenalee opened the door as Allen simultaneously shot up in his bed and shouted;_

_"Oh my god...I'M GAY!?"_

~~~~~o~~~~~o~~~~~O~~~~~o~~~~~o~~~~~

After his outburst Allen froze. He had that feeling...you know, the one where you can just _feel_ the presence of someone else in the room without even having to look at them. Allen remained frozen for a couple of seconds as he gathered his courage before turning his head in the direction of the presence he just knew was there. Upon turning, his eyes were met with the sight of...Lenalee. Allen swallowed thickly, his throat suddenly dry.

"Urm...Lenalee, hi...so uh how long have you b-been standing in my doorway?" Allen's face was bright red as he feared for the worst. Lenalee didn't even say anything at first but she giggled, and it was with that one solitary giggle that Allen knew the answer to his question before it even came.

"I opened the door at, I'd say, almost the exact same time you shot up in your bed, Allen-kun." Lenalee may have smiled and spoke sweetly but we musn't be fooled! Inside she was scheming, her inner fan-girl coming up with many disturbing, yet magnificent images and thoughts. Allen shuddered, he knew Lenalee well enough to have an inkling of an idea as to what she was currently thinking about. Right, however, as the British boy was about to open his mouth to ask Lenalee to kindly leave and let him be alone with his thoughts, Lenalee spoke.

"Well Allen-kun, I'm very proud of you, this is a big step! Admitting you're gay, even to just yourself, is very difficult. You must be awfully confused right now, what with all those thoughts running rampant in your mind, soooo.... why don't I just come in," at this Lenalee let herself all the way into Allen's room and shut the door, "and we'll have a nice little chat. Talking to someone always helps me to sort out how I feel." Lenalee once again smiled (sickly) sweet, as she walked over to Allen. The look she was giving him, along with the way she had spoke, gave the white haired teen the idea that there wasn't room for argument here and that whether he liked it or not, he and Lenalee were indeed having a chat about his sexuality.

Allen swallowed, this was going to be a very long and very painful conversation.

~~~~~o~~~~~o~~~~~O~~~~~o~~~~~o~~~~~

In another corridor of the Order, Kanda Yuu was feeling quite the opposite of our dear Moyashi. All things had gone quite well. When he'd woken up so fucking early in the morning today he had thought that the day was going to be shitty, turns out he was wrong, and for the first time in a very long time, Kanda could honestly say he was having a _good_ day. Kanda couldn't help but let out a fairly out of character, under the breath chuckle at this thought, it wasn't often that he applied the word good to his life, after all. It was so out of character in fact that a passing by finder who happened to hear it, adopted a look on his face that most probably would have mistaken for him foreseeing the apocalypse. Grinning a smug smirk Kanda continued to walk to his room, making sure to keep a watchful eye out for the Komurin that was currently out to get him, of course.

Unfortunately for Kanda he wasn't watchful enough.

Throughout the Order one single exclamation could be heard and it was;

"Oh, for FUCK'S SAKE!" After that the sound of metal scraping against metal and loud banging resonated throughout the hallways, causing everyone to retreat into their rooms, as was the normal 'Komurin vs. Kanda' drill.

It appeared Kanda was going to be slightly delayed in getting back to his Moyashi.

~~~~~o~~~~~o~~~~~O~~~~~o~~~~~o~~~~~

"So Allen-kun what exactly was it that made you realize you were gay, anyways?" Lenalee's smile couldn't have gotten any wider at this particular moment.

"Er...I'm not sure I'm at uh, _liberty_ to disclose such information..." Allen trailed off laughing nervously as he scratched the back of his head, praying that Lenalee somehow miraculously decided that, that was a fair answer and just left him be. However, unfortunately for Allen, Lenalee Lee **always** got her answers and this, most certainly, would not be an exception.

"Oh, Allen...Allen, Allen, _Allen_..." Lenalee shook her head slowly from left to right, a sympathizing, if not patronizing look on her face.

"I think it would probably be best if you told me," Lenalee left the threat hanging in the air for a moment, to let it really sink in and have the desired impact.

"It's not like I'd tell anyone anyways Allen, I mean can't you trust me? We are friends aren't we?!" Lenalee couldn't help but feel bad for using the guilt technique on Allen, she knew it was one of his greatest weaknesses, but desperate times called for desperate measures. She let a somewhat helpless pout form on her lips while pulling her face into a semi-heartbroken and betrayed mask. Looking up through lowered lashes Lenalee knew, if the panicked and guilty expression on his face was anything to go by, that she had him.

"No, we're definitely friends Lenalee...it's just that, I don't think the thing that made me realize this would like it very much if I told you... That's all really. You don't have to be so upset I er I-I mean," here Lenalee made her eyes get slightly damp and added a few pre-cry breaths, "Umm what I mean is..is well, after what he did to Lavi...I just...I don't think Kanda would like it very much if I told you that is...uh" Allen trailed off, after having thoroughly confused himself through all of his stuttering. It was enough for Lenalee though. She had gotten him to admit it was Kanda, now it would be easy to squeeze the rest out.

"Hmm, so it was Kanda huh? Well that would explain the blood on your floor... WAIT! He was in your room...and you figured out you were gay... and he left your room with this really pervy smirk on his face....OH MY GOD! DID YOU GUYS FU-"

"NO! NO, no no no NO! Definitely not we just kissed! Geez, Lenalee, get your mind out of the gutter! Why is that always the first thing you assume!?" (AN: there have been other times? O.o) Allen was once again beet red and Lenalee was smiling ever so deviously.

"So he kissed you?!"

"Er, well...Did I say that?! I didn't mean that uh... I was just referring to a... to a....FISH! I was talking about a fish and when we saw it...because we saw a fish and well you know what they do with their lips, haha ... uh 'smooch smooch' like kissing so it made me think of people... well kissing..." Allen was blushing and he knew it. Where was his poker face when he needed it!? He dared a look at Lenalee, she was staring at him with her eyebrows raised.

"Please Allen do continue telling me about the fishes, how about you tell me the full story of what happened between the fishes, I'm quite curious to find out."

"Well...um there was this really angry black fish, who was very attractive but still a complete asshole! Anyways there was another fish who was white and he was very nice and had a kind, calm nature to him." Lenalee gave Allen a very amused expression. An expression that very clearly said that she thought he was being slightly ridiculous but found that despite this she couldn't be bothered to stop him because she found his tale to be far too 'creative' and amusing. Plus if referring to Kanda and himself as fish, made it easier for Allen to tell her what had happened, then so be it.

"So the poor little white fish was just minding his own business and was going to the really clean water to get er...cleaner." Lenalee deciphered the previous sentence as, 'Allen had gone to the bath.'

"Then all of a sudden the black Kanda fish just randomly comes in and starts being an ass to the white fish." Lenalee didn't even bother reminding Allen that he had slipped and called the black fish Kanda.

"The next thing the white fish knows, the black fish is stripping ...a-and there's this weird stripper music playing in Allen fish's mind and Allen fish is very confused and was just thinking to himself about why he was hearing weird stripper music when Kanda very rudely interrupts and breaks him out of his thoughts! Which, due to the shock, may have made me kinda, sorta ....punch Kanda in the jaw..." Here Allen looked rather sheepish as he stared rather intently at his now clenched fists in his lap. It appeared that the British exorcist hadn't even realized he had stopped referring to himself and Kanda as black and white fishes.

"S-so then Kanda got sorta angry and since normally he yells at me I just closed my eyes waiting for him to flip out...but he didn't so I opened my eyes and he was really, really close to me! Then since Kanda's a bastard he had to... I dunno _tease_ me or something. So he started making fun of me saying I was blushing, which I _**wasn't**_...it was just...warm in the baths. So of course Kanda had to be a smart ass and make fun of me." Here Allen tightened his fists, his nostrils flaring ever so slightly as he remembered the events that had taken place a while back.

"Next thing I knew he was reeeally close and he was speaking straight into my ear, blowing really warm air on it which of course made me shiver and stupid baKanda had to take it the wrong way!" Allen seethed and Lenalee couldn't help but giggle lightly at his angry and rather pouty expression, he looked almost constipated. Allen swallowed deeply before continuing.

"Anyways then he said something or other....I don't really remember and some stuff which made me angry... but then his face started getting closer and closer and I didn't even bother moving away..." The British teen trailed off, face bright red as he very clearly imagined what happened next in his story. Lenalee leaned forward a little from her spot on his bed (AN:when did she get there?!)

"Er...T-then he uh...well, you know." Allen looked anywhere but at Lenalee's face. Lenalee smiled slightly evilly.

"Hmm? No, actually Allen, I don't think I do know. What is it that Kanda did?" A horror-stricken expression on his face, Allen opened his mouth several times before a sound finally came out.

"I...well. He....with his mouth...and did things and ....Oh come on! I know you know Lenalee!" Allen exclaimed in exasperation, giving her a pleading look. Lenalee replied to this with one single very pointed look.

"Ugh! Fine, he kissed me! On the mouth and I didn't pull away! I didn't pull away at all, I let him do it, as a matter of fact I'd have to say that I really enjoyed it! I, Allen Walker, not only let Kanda Yuu kiss me, I kissed him back! And that, Lenalee, is why I realized that I'm gay! Are you happy now!? Huh, are you!? Allen's chest was heaving and his face couldn't have gotten any redder. Lenalee however seemed unphased if anything pensive.

"...So how long do you think it'll be before you two fuck...?"

* * *

**AN: Well, how was it?! Not too bad I hope. Anyways reviews are very welcome and make me happier than you can imagine...unless you write stories and get reviews too in which case you might understand my happiness! XD **

**Thanks for reading, byes! :D  
**


	8. Sew Not Interested

**AN: WOAH! Hasn't it only been _several _days since I last updated?! Ahhh gotta love my inconsistency, first I don't update for over two months and then randomly I decide to update twice in a week! XD **

**This chapter is kinda weird and I (again) don't really like it! DX I feel like the style I wrote this chapter in is fairly different from the one I wrote the last one with. Then again I feel that way after nearly ever chapter and then once I read it when it's up on fanfiction I don't normally feel that way. Regardless every chapter I feel like I'm losing my style of writing and in this one in particular I feel like I've lost the crack-ish flow of the story. Maybe the reason I feel my style changes is because it's getting better? (Lol I only just know while writing thought of that possibility...) I don't think that's it though...well maybe...I dunno... Anyways yah sorry about the little confused rant. I feel like you guys should know that I think these things in case you maybe noticed something like that too. You never know. XD **

**Warning: This chapter contains random extra characters. They're not OC's because I very randomly created them and never plan on using them again for anything. Ever. ...unless maybe I have one of them stalk some of the exorcists....that would be neat.... ANYHOOS! I don't think that will happen, so don't worry about it. Regardless there are kinda, sorta, not really "OC's" in this chapter. Oh and gratuitous amounts of swearing, courtesy of our dear Kanda. Also there is very blatant reference to gay sex.  
**

**Disclaimer: No. And I've decided that this disclaimer is covering the whole story so....I'm not doing this again in any chapters. So don't bother trying to sue me.  
**

* * *

_Last Time_

_"...So how long do you think it'll be until you two fuck..."_

"L-Lenalee!" Allen spluttered, his brain basically dieing right there on the spot. The white haired boy turned ghostly pale as he tried desperately to reboot his currently broken and malfunctioning mind.

"Well, Allen, I mean it's probably going to happen sometime. If you like him -and don't bother even trying to deny it because I know you do- and if he likes you too, which he obviously does, I mean let's face it this is Kanda after all! He doesn't just go around kissing anybody. But anyways, if you like each other than chances are there are going to be a lot more 'encounters' between the two of you in the future and eventually it'll probably turn into sex." Lenalee gave a very strange and pervy smile, one that easily reflected her fan girl nature.

Allen shuddered. First he had, had to endure this talk, about how he and Kanda were inevitably going to have sexual intercourse, with Lavi and now a second time with Lenalee. God, someone really hated him up there. So... Allen pulled a sour face.

"Oh come on now Allen-kun, don't give me that look!" Here Lenalee got up to stand in front of Allen with her hands on her hips and her back to his door. An attempt at intimidation....which most definitely worked.

"It's not like sex with Kanda would be unbearable, if anything it would probably be amazing! He's ridiculously handsome and sexy -his body is to die for- he's very strong and in top physical condition," while Lenalee was listing all of Kanda's good sex attributes, Allen began making weird hand gestures as if to tell her to stop, however Lenalee just ignored him and played it off as him being embarrassed. After getting fed up of being ignored, Allen spoke up.

"Lenalee stop...no really he's-" but Lenalee rather abruptly cut him off.

"Now Allen-kun you've already admitted you're gay and that you like him. Stop being immature and listen! It's probably healthy for you to begin to accept and appreciation Kanda in a more sexual way!"

"Lenalee really STO-"

"Allen! Good God you're being very childish, I realize the two of you don't always see eye to eye but that doesn't mean you can't let yourself find him attractive! Now where was I... oh yes, he's in great physical condition he could probably pound you through not only the mattress but the floor, if you really wanted him to." Allen's eyes couldn't have possibly bulged out any further than they did at the last statement, the same eyes that were currently glued to his doorway.

"And then, of course, there's the fact that...well, I mean, let's face it, Kanda's bloody well hung like a horse." Lenalee said without an ounce of shame. And Allen promptly choked on his own tongue.

"How the _FUCK_ do you know that!?" Lenalee froze at the deep, very obviously _not _Allen's voice coming from behind her. She turned around to see Kanda standing in Allen's doorway, an absolutely mortified and disturbed expression on his face. It was rather disgruntling to have someone you viewed as a sister -scratch that, not just a sister, a _younger_ sister- know and share that kind of information with people that you did in fact wish to sleep with.

"Kanda! What on Earth are you doing here!?" Lenalee exclaimed, genuinely surprised.

"I told the Moyashi I'd come back after I washed off the blood. Unfortunately, I ran into that bloody machine made by your fucking lunatic brother, so it took me longer than I'd anticipated to get back to the sprout's room."

"Hm, maybe and just maybe, if you hadn't tried, and very nearly succeeded, in murdering Lavi the Komurin wouldn't have come after you." The Chinese exorcist gave Kanda a fairly smug grin, to which he curled one of lips.

"That fucking rabbit had it coming. Someone needs to teach him some God damn respect and if nobody else is willing to do it than I will and I'll use my own fucking methods." Lenalee laughed.

"Oh Kanda, you're so uptight. You really do need to get laid... that said, I think I should probably get going. Brother's probably going crazy and I think one Komurin massacre is enough for today." Lenalee inched her way to the door while Kanda came further inside, in order to let her out. Allen still quite dazed, swallowed thickly not really sure what to do at this point in time.

"Bye you two! Don't have _too_ much fun!" And with that Lenalee was gone leaving an awkward silence between the two.

Several minutes were spent in silence until, finally, Kanda couldn't take any more of it. Walking over to Allen's bed, in several quick but long strides, Kanda grabbed the teens arm and pulled him up, while saying;

"Fuck this, let's go outside for a walk or some other girlie shit." Allen said nothing, as he got pulled towards his door, assuming he didn't actually have to. This _was_ Kanda after all and he'd probably just drag him outside regardless of Allen's opinion. To Allen's surprise however, when they got to his door Kanda stopped and looked down (God damn that tall bastard!) at him expectantly. Expectant of what though, Allen wasn't quite sure.

"Well, are you going to answer my fucking question sprout or do I have to say it again!?" Allen's eyebrows furrowed and his eye twitched.

"What you said before didn't actually qualify as a question, baKanda. But no, I wouldn't mind going for a walk. And it's _not _girlie Kanda, people go for walks all the time, regardless of their gender." Allen rolled his eyes sarcastically and pretended to actually be a little angry, though he and Kanda both knew he really wasn't.

"Che, fine it wasn't necessarily a 'question' but it was a very open statement and most idiots have common sense enough to give their opinions in those such moments. Oh, and it _is_ girlie, whether you accept it or not baka-Moyashi.... that's why I figured you'd like it." Kanda smirked and absent mindedly reached down to brush a strand of white hair out of Allen's eye. Allen had to fight back the urge to turn this 'gentle debate' into a full on argument. So he didn't bite back and just let the Japanese teen have his way, but just this one time. And his lack of reaction had nothing to do with the very distracting and calming way Kanda was sweeping his hair out of his eyes. Nope. Nothing at all.

"Fine, baKanda, fine."

It felt strange and different to have Kanda casually wipe hair out of his face and it was rather soothing to allow Kanda's fingers to linger as they slowly traveled down the soft skin of his cheek. Having Kanda's calloused and very much masculine hands gently caressing his face was relaxing and though it should've disturbed him, he couldn't help but lean into the touch just a bit.

"Che, let's get going, baka-Moyashi."

~~~~~o~~~~~o~~~~~O~~~~~o~~~~~o~~~~~

After several arguments, in front of the Order's formal entrance, concerning where they were going to go for a walk, they both came to something of a compromise and decided to walk down the road a ways then turn off at the gardens just a couple blocks down.

"Sooo..." Allen started, unsure how to have an actual conversation with Kanda, without it turning into a fight.

"No but I knit a little." Kanda said without missing a beat. (1)

"Oh, that's ni- wait...what?" Allen was confused, what did the fact that Kanda could knit a little have to do with what he had said before... Let's see he had said, 'Sooo...' and then Kanda had said that he knit...Oh! _Sew! _and then Kanda had said that he _knit_! Allen got it now...but wait, did that mean that Kanda had just made an extremely lame joke?

Looking towards Kanda, it seemed as though he were composed but Allen could tell that he was fairly embarrassed and slightly....mortified? with what he'd said.

Kanda cleared his throat rather awkwardly before explaining himself.

"It's a uh...joke, that fucking Tiedoll used to say when I was little. Sometimes it just slips out." It amazed Allen that coming on to another male while practically naked in a bath house, didn't really seem to embarrass Kanda at all, but saying some corny joke that General Tiedoll used to say did in fact make him flustered.

Allen couldn't help but laugh at the image of a small Kanda getting angry at Tiedoll every time he'd said the joke.

"Oh shut up Moyashi, it's not _that_ funny!"

"No, I agree, the joke really wasn't that funny but I was just picturing you as a little kid getting all angry at Tiedoll for saying it. I bet you were an annoying but absolutely adorable kid!" Kanda pursed his lips together and flared his nostrils at the idea of himself and adorable in the same sentence, not to mention the various memories of him getting pissed off at that bloody old man coming to mind.

"Ugh, I'd rather not think about that bean."

"But why ever not Kanda? And I'm not a bean, my name's Allen, you idiot!" Allen gave a huff of disapproval and rolled his eyes. When he rolled his eyes though he caught sight of a group of girls all staring and beginning to walk in his and Kanda's general direction.

"You are so a bean, the sooner you deal with it the better. And of course I don't want to rememb-" but Kanda was interrupted.

"E-excuse me, um hi...I'm Christie and um, well I was just wondering what your name was..." The girl, Christie it would seem, was now batting her eyelashes in a very overtly flirty manner. To be fair, Allen had to admit she was pretty, she also seemed to be the leader of the group of girls because the others were standing in a huddle a couple of feet behind her watching in awe.

"Che." Was all Kanda said and Allen couldn't help his eye from twitching at the blatant rudeness.

"He's Kanda, and I'm Allen. He's pleased to meet you... _Aren't you Kanda?!_" Allen spoke sweetly with a gentleman's politeness...aside from the last sentence which was spoken through clenched teeth.

"Whatever." Was Kanda's lovely reply. The coldness didn't seem to deter Christie at all though, if anything she was looking at him even more dreamily.

"Your name's Kanda? Oh my god that's so exotic! Where are you from, like...Mexico or something?!" Pretty, Allen concluded, but not too bright.

"Look Christine-"

"It's Christie."

"Like I care. Anyways, Carrie, I'm really not interested, so please leave me **alone**." Allen's eyes nearly popped out of his head, as he thought, 'how can he be so heartless?... well, at least he said please this time. It's a start.'

"Ooo, you're so forceful and mysterious! I like that!" As Kanda huffed in annoyance, another girl came forward. This one had obviously gained courage from her friends brave endeavor and walked up to...Allen?

"Umm...hi, I'm Rose....It's very nice t-to meet you Mister Allen." She was quite soft spoken it seemed, so Allen smiled at her very gently.

"It's a pleasure to meet you too Rose." He shook her hand delicately and was about to begin a nice round of small talk with her but was quickly interrupted by Kanda and his lovely manners.

"Listen, Chrinkle-"

"It's _Christie_!" Now she was beginning to get indignant.

"Like I give a shi-"

"Kanda! Stop being an ass!"

"Look, will you just go out to dinner with me!?" Christie said, now very clearly impatient, but regardless of how much of an ass he was being to her, she still wanted to go to dinner with him since he was an, 'exotic hottie.'

"Um...actually, Allen, I was wondering if maybe you would like to go for a walk with me....if you want to that is.... you don't have to, but I-I was just wondering...." Before Allen had time to give an answer to Rose, Kanda gave one for him.

"Look I'm. _**Not**_. Fucking. Interested." Here Kanda grabbed one of Allen's hands with his own and lifted them, brandishing their held hands in the two girls faces whilst saying;

"And he's not interested either!" And with that Kanda dragged Allen away, Allen's hand still firmly (and possessively) grasped in Kanda's own. They left the two girls standing there, shocked and slightly dazed looks spreading straight across their lovely faces.

~~~~~o~~~~~o~~~~~O~~~~~o~~~~~o~~~~~

While Kanda dragged him through the garden to god only knows where, Allen noticed that it was officially night time. The little street lamps lining the stone path, that they were following through the garden, were lit and giving off a warm golden glow.

Allen smiled, it really was stunning.

After another good 5 minutes of 'brisk' walking, with their hands still intertwined, Kanda finally stopped and pointed with his free hand saying a gruff,

"Look." And Allen's eyes looked to where Kanda's left hand was pointing. They were standing on a bridge looking out over a small river, trees lined the dark mudded shores and the golden hue of the lamps was both in the air and the water. Upon closer inspection Allen could also see the faint reflection of the half moon, that was just beginning to peak out of the night sky, shimmering a dull silver in the calm water.

"Woah, Kanda this is gorgeous! How did you find this place?"

"Che, I came across it a couple years ago while on a stupid mission in this area. I come here and do some meditating every once in a while, now that we've changed over to the new headquarters. I brought us here because I figured those god damn idiots wouldn't be willing to run this far to stalk us."

"I can see why you come back here, it's absolutely amazing! I feel like I've walked into a painting." Allen sighed peacefully then inhaled deeply, the somewhat sweet and pleasantly moist air rejuvenating him.

"God you act like a fucking girl," Kanda snorted but then remembered something.

"Ah, speaking of that I have something for you, I got it while they were doing the rabbit's x-rays. It's something I couldn't help but notice you don't really have so I thought I'd get it for you.

"You got me something!?" Allen asked incredulously. Amazed at how sincere and dare he say it...sweet, Kanda was acting.

"Yes, I just said that moron, try listening once in a while."

"You're such an ass." Allen grumbled, a little upset that the whole 10 seconds of Kanda being kind and tolerable were over.

"I know and thank you Moyashi," Kanda grinned with an odd sense of pride in a seemingly joking and sarcastic way, Allen decided he could probably get used to Kanda's barely there sense of humor. Allen didn't really realize it, but he was staring rather blatantly at Kanda, deciding that he kinda liked the slightly witty and relaxed expression on the Japanese man's face. He didn't realize he was staring. Until Kanda turned to look at him too. For some odd reason though instead of quickly moving away Allen stayed frozen, his pale grayish blue and Kanda's deep cobalt blue eyes meeting. And they held the gaze. Soon Allen was reminded of the fact that Kanda was holding his hand because the black haired exorcist had begun to gently rub his thumb against the top of Allen's hand. The moment was perfect...until a giant mosquito landed on Allen's nose.

After swatting the _**beast**_ of a mosquito off of his nose, the two teenagers became rather awkwardly quiet, however despite the obvious awkwardness they both didn't let the others hand go. Well until Kanda rather abruptly remembered that he had gotten Allen a gift.

"Hmm, I almost forgot, but here's the damn thing." At that Kanda finally released Allen's hand and pulled the gift out of one of his exorcist jackets inner breast pockets. And to Allen's surprise it looked like a ....pharmaceutical pill bottle?

"Kanda....what _is_ that?"

"Look for yourself, Moyashi" At that Kanda tossed the bottle to Allen who easily caught it with his right hand and flipped it over to read the title.

"...methyltestosterone: Testred® ....uh what does that mean?" (2) Allen was beyond confused.

And it was now that Kanda decided to fully ruin one of the only actual half decent moments between himself and the British exorcist.

"Che, you're such an idiot. It's, 'methyl**testosterone****,**' they're fucking hormone supplement pills."

* * *

**AN: BEWARE OF LOOOONG Authors Note! **

**Well there it is! 8D I hope you liked it! I didn't actually mind this chapter.... for once.**

**(1) Okay this is a reeeeeally lame joke I've heard and can definitely imagine Tiedoll saying on a fairly regular basis when Kanda was a kid. For those of you who don't get the joke....well first, FAIL! That's fairly pathetic....although I didn't really get it the instant I heard it either so don't feel too bad. Secondly the joke (if it can even be called that) is someone says 'So' which is a heterograph of 'Sew' *heterographs are a group of words that sound the same but have a different meaning and spelling...God I'm a nerd ...* Anyways so then a person replies, 'no I knit a little.' In other words it is a play on words.**

**(2) I actually looked up 'Testosterone Supplement' one Blackle *blackle is the environmentally friendly google because black screens use less energy! USE BLACKLE!* Anyways.... a lot of ..._stuff _came up. So I just had to look on wikipedia and I lied about the facts because technically both, 'methyltestosterone and Testred****Testred®' ****are brand names for testosterone pills. Apparently they're both not very good and can cause you to become very ill. So I made methyltestosterone into the 'scientific name' of it and ****Testred® as the brand name....maybe because it had the little ****"®" next to it.... . **

**Anyways please review! I apologize for my horrendously long Author Notes!  
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	9. Side Effects May Include

**AN: Holy shit. It's been over two months! D8 I'm sorry you guys! I've been dealing with life. I'm not even going to begin to explain 'cuz it would take too long. Anyways, I'm really sorry, the good news is one of the main reasons that I was unable to update has been eliminated and I'm extremely ill so I'll probably be able to beat my computer into working for some of the days I'm home. The bad news is that this is technically the last chapter of this fic, although I will be adding one chapter after this as an epilogue, and I've already started writing it because I dare not waste the precious time I actually have on my computer! XD Also I've begun to write another Yullen story in my notebook .... and it's gonna be long. I've got the first chapter sooo I think I'll begin uploading that once I'm done this fic, which believe it or not should be within the next week or two.  
**

**On another note I'm finally going to be getting my MAC BOOK PRO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm paying for over half of it but I don't mind! My mom's going to pay the difference and get it for me for Christmas! 8D I'm so excited to have a computer that works more than like once or twice a month! My mom's only willing to buy it because I'll need it to go to University since I'm planning on becoming a graphic designer.**

**Also this chapter contains a great deal of dialogue and not a whole lot of humor... oh well. Actually it's quite sappy... which is definitely one of my weak spots as far as writing goes.**

**Oh and I will soon begin looking for a beta...I would prefer someone who likes Yullen and has great grammatical skills...because I sorta lack them...Anyways I'll go check that 'beta reader' thing but I was just wondering if any of you guys would be interested! I'd like a reader who already knows my stuff and likes it! So just putting that out there... 8D  
**

**Warnings: Gayness ...you should know that by now and swearing...Kanda's one of the main characters after all.**

**Disclaimer: No.  
**

* * *

_Last Time_

_And it was now that Kanda decided to fully ruin one of the only actual half decent moments between himself and the British exorcist._

_"Che, you're such an idiot. It's, 'methyl**testosterone,**' they're fucking hormone supplement pills."_

The world stood still for several moments, however it wasn't one of those happy and romantic, 'the world stood still as they gazed into each others eyes,' moments. Oh hell no. It was one of those, 'the world stood still because there was suddenly an overload of dark energy flowing to the rather small pinpoint on Earth, that was Allen Walker' moments. This abrupt change of energy confused the world so it had to pause in order to regain its composure. As did Allen.

The fiery pits of hell seemed like a field of daisies compared to the look of sheer hatred and death Allen was currently shooting at Kanda.

Despite his normal composed and aloof air, Kanda couldn't repress a shudder. It appeared the Moyashi didn't entirely appreciate his gift.

After a few moments of attempting to calm himself and not flip out/ murder Kanda with his mind, Allen decided that perhaps just glaring at Kanda wasn't enough to ease the immense amounts of anger he currently felt flowing through his veins. And, as he was at a complete loss as to what Kanda was thinking when he'd gotten the 'gift,' he figured it really couldn't hurt to ask, albeit in a calm and composed manner...he didn't want to seem immature after all.

"Kanda... What the **hell**?!" Allen's eye twitched, being calm was a lot more difficult then he had figured. He stopped briefly and planned out a small dialogue in his head, one that sounded far less distraught. He took a deep breath before beginning.

"You bought me HORMONE supplement pills!? What the hell were you thinking, why would you even DO that!? Did you actually think I would appreciate this- No, wait, don't even answer that, I really don't want to know! I don't have any idea what was going through that insanely handsome head of yours, and I don't want to know!" Hmm, when going over that in his head it had sounded a great deal more calm...and far less embarrassing....he hadn't meant to call Kanda handsome, it just sorta happened when he looked from his full lips to his long perfect nose, and finally to his strong, deep, blue eyes...'_shit,'_ he thought, _'concentrate Allen, concentrate.'_

Kanda gave a dramatic roll of his (gorgeous!) eyes, then crossed his arms on his chest slightly defensively, before thoroughly ignoring Allen's request of not answering.

"First off, I never said I _bought _you anything... I took them while the head nurse was giving the idiot rabbit an x-ray. Secondly, I-"

"Wait, wait, wait, wait, WAIT! You didn't even go to the trouble of buying this horrid "gift" you STOLE them!? I don't even know what to say to you right now! As if this wasn't bad enough, you really just don't know when to quit do you!?"

"What does it matter if I took them without the head nurse knowing, they give this shit out for free (1) I only took them 'cuz I knew you needed them and I was sure that you wouldn't go and get them for yourself- fuck I don't even blame you for that! I sure as hell wouldn't want to go ask the nurse for this. And that's why I DIDN'T! I know you're embarrassed that you need these Moyashi, and honestly you damn well should be, but if you don't have them certain... _things_ may not change... and I sure as hell don't want to become a pedophile!"

Allen remained very silent after Kanda's small speech. Sure he was still mad, livid actually, but he at least kinda understood Kanda's motives. If he really thought about it, it actually was kinda sweet... well about as sweet as stealing someone hormone pills could be, although as far as Kanda went, this was practically a bouquet of roses... And a small part of Allen's brain couldn't help but do a tiny victory dance when he recalled Kanda saying that he didn't want to _become_ a pedophile, that meant that Kanda was really, truly planning on continuing the odd and very sudden relationship they had started. At that thought Allen felt a goofy grin start to pull at the corner of his lips. And Kanda, noticing the change from scowl to grin on the Moyashi's face, figured that he was almost forgiven, so perhaps it would be safe to continue.

"Look Moyashi, if it really is because of your innocence than it's not even your damn fault, so you should stop sulking about it and damn well accept my fucking gift!" Dammit that hadn't come out nearly as endearing and comforting as Kanda had wanted. He cleared his throat and tried again, his forehead sweating from the immense effort of being a half decent person.

"Er... what I meant is, uh, that it isn't your fault. All I was trying to do was uh...well I was just...kinda-trying-to-help-you-so-just-fucking-accept-it-already-you-bloody-moron!" Kanda finished off very quickly, running the words into one another and then after finishing turned his head away, because he was most definitely NOT blushing thank you very much...he just very suddenly found the small patch of grass, to the left of his foot, incredibly intriguing...As a matter of fact there was a small bug family on one of the particularly large blades of grass. The Watson's, he decided. Perhaps they were all sitting down to one of those stupid, cozy, family dinners....Kanda stopped himself and attempted to refrain from twitching at the very sudden lack of sanity he had just displayed. Thoroughly disturbed he determined that there was probably less harm in risking a look up at the bean, then returning his eyes to the scene portrayed by the little black bugs.

Allen's stupid grin grew into a full blown smile. It made him feel really warm to know that Kanda had actually tried to help him... The way he had tried to help was _very _strange and most normal people would find it more than slightly offensive but Allen was definitely not just any normal person, perhaps that was one of the reasons why Kanda liked him...They were both pretty damn weird in their own ways. What person would get a warm feeling from someone saying, ' uh...well I was just...kinda-trying-to-help-you-so-just-fucking-accept-it-already-you-bloody-moron!' ? ...Well, apparently Allen Walker would.

"Fine baKanda, I forgive you. I still don't see how my ...problem... would make you a pedophile! I mean I'm fifteen years old...that's only two and a half years younger than you!"

"Che, it doesn't matter how old you are! I'm definitely not screwing someone that resembles a naked mole rat!" Kanda's lip curled in disgust.

"First off, I find that immensely offensive, I do **not **resemble a naked rodent. And who said there'd be any screwing! And if there was to be any of... _'that sort of stuff_' I doubt it would be _you_ screwing _me_, you're the one that looks like a girl!"

"Nobody has to _say_ that there's going to be '_any of that sort of stuff_', it's just obvious. And trust me Moyashi there is no way in hell you are topping. It's actually almost funny that you honestly think you would be, because trust me, when you're with me you will never top. Some guys can do it either way but you and I just aren't like that. _You_, are an uke, and _I_, am a seme. You should probably deal with it now, otherwise you'll be in for quite the shock when we do get around to, _'that sort of stuff'_." Kanda snorted a couple times at the hilarity he seemed to find in the current situation. Allen just looked confused and fairly pissed off.

"What's an uke and what on earth is a seme!?" Kanda's eyes widened and he replied only after a very long and awkward pause. And his reply was definitely not one that any person would want to here.

"Ask Lenalee." This time Allen's eyes widened. Nothing good could surely come of that.

"Why do I need to ask Lenalee!? Why can't you tell me....Wait is it an insult!? Because you are treading on some very thin ice right now, I wouldn't push your luck if I were you!"

"It's not a damn insult Moyashi. But I don't want to have to carry you back to the Order since you seem to have a lovely fucking habit of passing out when '_any of that sort of stuff_' is brought up. I'm actually quite surprised that you managed to live through our brief conversation." Kanda snorted at the expression on the bean's face.

"I don't pass out every time I talk about s-sex," shit he just _had_ to stutter didn't he, "I've just had some very bad experiences with it...you didn't live with Cross for several years...I've seen and heard things you can't even begin to imagine..."

"_Y-yes_ you do pass out when we talk about _s-sex_. Oh and I'm sure I could imagine a lot of the things you've seen." Kanda was very clearly making fun of Allen now, but it became a lot lighter and more playful when a leaf landed in Allen's hair and Kanda took the liberty of taking it out while gently almost ruffling the snowy white locks.

"And for all I know bean, you could've passed out when Cross talked to you about it." There was a slight pause as a gentle wind blew past them and Kanda let his cold fingers glide across Allen's warm cheek...wait warm?

"Holy shit, are you blushing _again_ bean!? Che, and you actually thought you would be topping."

"Shut up! Maybe if you'd stop doing things like _this_," here Allen attempted to swat Kanda's hand from his face, but failed when Kanda just grabbed his hand and intertwined their fingers bringing them up to his own face, with the back of Allen's hand facing him and gently kissed it, "...a-and that...maybe then I'd stop blushing."

"Che, I like making you blush idiot." And with that Allen was pulled flat against Kanda's chest, with a set of very warm and slightly chapped lips pressed tightly against his own.

After their kiss ended they just stood there. For once Allen recognized the feeling of comfort growing in the pit of his stomach. Unfortunately they were both beginning to get cold and though Allen found warmth burying his head in the Japanese exorcists chest, and Kanda in Allen's hair they both concurred that, contrary to popular belief- as portrayed in most romantic films- they were not, in fact, capable of becoming comfortably warm from the others bodily heat and thus both deduced that they should probably head back to the Order, as to not catch cold.

"Moyashi, we should head back now, it's getting chilly and it's already quite dark." Being as Kanda was far less sensitive as Allen, he didn't have much of a problem breaking their silent reverie. However in a rare moment of gentleness he decided that now would be an appropriate time to plant a small kiss on the top of the bean sprout's head before pulling away from him and grabbing his hand once more. Allen nodded his head and looked the other way determined to not have Kanda see the very bright red colour of his cheeks. And Kanda thought that just this once he would let the bean get away with it, so he said nothing and began walking.

They walked in silence for several moments, until Allen, his blush now gone, just couldn't take it anymore.

"Seriously though, _hormone supplements?! _ You don't actually expect me to take them do you!? ...Do you?" Judging by Kanda's face it would seem that he really did expect Allen to take the pills.

"Che, I think you can make that call for yourself, Moyashi. I do, however, have a feeling that you won't be able to resist now that you actually have them in your possession. Trust me bean, there's more shame in being a prepubescent boy at the age of fifteen, nearly sixteen actually, then being someone who has fully hit puberty but has to take some pills to help him get and stay all the way there."

"...I'm going to pretend that, that was sweet and comforting because I have a feeling that, that's about as good as it's going to get with you." Allen said this dryly, but there was still a hint of playfulness there.

"Well, at least you're realistic Moyashi. And you're right, that is about as good as it's gonna get, so you better get used to it." Kanda's smirk was slightly contradicted by the light squeeze he gave to Allen's hand.

"You're not gonna be able to get rid of me now bean." At that Allen leaned against Kanda and smiled.

"I never said that I would even try.... although I guess I could try those pills. I mean they couldn't really do me any harm..."

"Stupid sap. And you're damn right you could try those pills! Although the side effects may include;_ itchy throat, diarrhea, vomiting, swollen eyes, puffiness, pain when urinating, uncontrollable anal leakage (2), cramps, loss of appetite, aches, yellowing of the skin, a change of colour in the iris, and extreme weight gain._

"...UNCONTROLLABLE ANAL LEAKAGE!?"

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**AN: Yup. I think this is my least favorite chapter. I even read over all the old chapters and this one I find even worse than all the other ones that I said I hated.... DX **

**(1) I'm not even kidding I got a pamphlet for something along the lines of this in the mail, and it was for free. Also in some countries medication is free so let's just use our imaginations alright.**

**(2) I once saw a commercial for some "health" product and while listing all the side effects they literally said, "uncontrollable anal leakage," I've seen the commercial several times since and it says the same thing....so I just _had _to use it. XD**

**Thanks so much for reading you guys! I'm terribly sorry for the ridiculously long wait!  
**

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	10. THE Question Returns The Epic Epilogue

**AN: I don't upload for over two months and then I upload two chapters all in one night.... God I'm strange. XD**

**This is the last chapter of 'That Which Is White' **

**This chapter is veeeery similar to Ch.1 BUT despite this please read the whole thing and don't skip, because there are some fairly important parts that were changed. Anyways this is a fairly good chapter with an extremely corny and cliche ending...but oh well!**

**Warnings: Blatant mentioning of gay sex, Swearing, and an overall sense of crudeness... XD**

**Disclaimer: I wish....but no.  
**

_

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Last Time_

_"...UNCONTROLLABLE ANAL LEAKAGE!?"_

It had been two months now. Kanda and Allen were still together, though they fought nearly daily, and nobody asides from Lavi, Lenalee, and somehow, though Kanda hated it, Tiedoll. Allen had decided to take the pills...though he had yet to tell Kanda. Then again, he really didn't need to tell Kanda because judging from the fact that the Moyashi was beginning to grow hair in places that used to be bare, Kanda was able- after much very deep and strenuous thinking- to figure out that the Moyashi had used his gift and still continued to.

The growth of hair went unspoken for a very long time until one night, after certain _'activities'_, Kanda just couldn't remain silent any longer.

"So I see you took my advice and used my 'gift'." Kanda smirked at the suddenly very quiet Allen.

"W-what makes you say that?" Allen gulped and laughed nervously, looking anywhere but at the Japanese exorcist's face. It was probably a good thing that Allen didn't look at Kanda's face, considering the disbelieving and dry look that was currently being sent to him, the look that all but said, 'are you fucking serious?'

"Che, I don't know Moyashi, I guess I just got a feeling. It couldn't have anything to do with the fact that you're currently naked...that would just be ridiculous." Allen puffed out his now burning red cheeks.

"Shut up and go to sleep baKanda." With that the British teen promptly turned his back to Kanda and fell asleep. Meanwhile Kanda, still slightly flabbergasted, slowly lay back down and let sleep take him as well.

In the morning Allen and Kanda decided around eight 'o clock to go and get breakfast. Allen was in a particularly good mood, he smiled and said good morning to some of the finders they happened to pass on their way, he couldn't help but notice that everyone seemed to be in a rather pleasant mood. He mentioned this to Kanda but received a rather inexpressive, 'che' in answer. Finally reaching their destination Allen instantly bolted to the counter, and Kanda followed rather leisurely behind, to where Jerry was eagerly waiting to take their order.

While waiting for their orders to finish the cursed boy heard his and Kanda's name being called and looked over towards a table to see Lenalee and Lavi. Allen happily called back and was about to wave when the smell of his meal beckoned him to turn around, drool already threatening to fall from his opened mouth. Quickly saying thank you to Jerry, Allen and Kanda made their way to their friends (though Kanda would never admit it.)

Finally making it to their destination the white haired boy gently placed his food down and said a hasty but proper good morning, before he began to devour his food at a pace not quite human. Kanda merely sat down in his annoyingly graceful way, sent a nod to everyone and began to eat his food in a very polite fashion. Although Allen had nearly 10 times as much food as the other three put together he still managed to finish before any of them were done. Once Allen's feeding frenzy was done they all sat in relative silence aside from the quiet murmurs coming from around them and the varying sounds one hears in a cafeteria such as forks gently scraping plates, or even people chewing. None of them moved, all quite content in the stillness and quiet, all except one. Though it was hardly noticeable at first Lavi's eye began to twitch, just a little twitch but a twitch none the less. Soon however this once small twitch became rather large and noticeable, so noticeable in fact that it caught his entire company's attention.

And it was here that Allen thought, _'this seems very familiar... almost like it's been copy and pasted from a previous day *coughchapteronecough* and had only a few minor elements changed...how very_ _strange...'_

So each of them gave him their own signature looks of perplexity, which were conveniently the exact same as a day in the past; Allen's being a slight tilt of his head with an innocent and curious face, Lenalee's a quirk of one delicate eyebrow and a slightly unnerved smile, and finally Kanda who simply stared at Lavi looking only slightly disturbed with the abnormal and more then likely unhealthy twitching and looking almost entirely pissed that this moron had the nerve to twitch in his presence. Finally, right as Allen had opened his mouth ready to question Lavi on just why his eye was convulsing, Lavi let out a loud, strangled yell,

"I CAN'T TAKE IT!! ALL THIS SILENCE IS DRIVING ME CRAZY!" Everyone in the cafeteria was shocked, various people even falling from their seats at the sudden and completely random outburst.

Silence filled the entire cafeteria then, you couldn't hear even a single person breathe. However someone must always break the silence and so Kanda did just that....just like last time....

"Baka usagi..." was the first thing to be heard after the outburst, the second was the sound of a vein promptly popping in Kanda's forehead, and the third was the simultaneous sound of mugen being unsheathed and Lavi releasing a rather feminine scream he would most definitely deny later, as he had the previous time this event had occurred.

After finally managing to calm the infuriated Japanese teen down, and get him to put his precious mugen back in it's hilt, Allen sat back down on the table's bench with a thud. 'Well the day started peaceful at least,' thought Allen as he heaved a rather uncharacteristically large sigh. The white haired teen gave a brief shake of his head to clear his mind, his white locks swaying from the movement. And that was the end of it. The true end of the peaceful day had come, with just that one gesture, and Allen didn't even know it, not yet at least.

~-~-~-~-~-~-o~-~-~-~-~-~-~-o~-~-~-~-~-~-~-o~-~-~-~-~-~-~o~-~-~-~-~-~-~

A dark cold aura suddenly fell upon the cafeteria, like a thick gray fog. The redheaded bookman's single visible eye glinted dangerously as he fixed his gaze on Allen. The aforementioned moyashi instantly paled and gulped nervously. He could see the gears in Lavi's mind were spinning quickly coming up with some dastardly thought, that Allen knew from sheer instinct he didn't actually want to know about. This had happened before, and the after math was horrendous...except the part where he'd gotten with Kanda...that had actually been pretty great.

Within a second Allen's mind began coming up with possible escape plans and weighing their probability at being successful. He could always randomly start making out with Kanda...that would certainly take Lavi's mind off of what he'd just done. Although that would cause Lavi to begin asking awkward questions about their sex life...So that was out of the picture. He could rip open his shirt and scream, 'ME TARZAN!' ...but baKanda would never let him live that down...Well he could always go to desperate measures and just stab himself with Mugen. Although there was a large possibility of death involved in that...he did value his life...but Lavi's questions could be horrible...No, he thought, that would be a lose, lose situatio-

"Ne, Moyashi-chan..."

Unfortunately Allen's thoughts were cut short as Lavi had finished his thought process and had called out to him. He had run out of time. He was a dead man now. Allen begrudgingly turned his head to face Lavi once more, and was met with a disturbing sight. Lavi's face appeared completely normal. From experience the British boy knew that this was one of the worst possible signs, whatever thought that Lavi had, had was obviously truly horrid. The bookman jr. only ever acted like nothing was wrong when he was about to say or do something that had the potential to be emotionally crippling. He would act normal in an attempt to calm down and lower the guards of his victim. Allen swallowed thickly and took several, what he hoped were unnoticeable, deep breaths.

"Y-yes, Lavi?" Allen finally stuttered out, daring to look around the table at his other friends, to gage their reactions and check to see if he was just perhaps overreacting. He looked first to Lenalee who had looked away in what he assumed was a mixture of respect for the dead (or soon to be) and dread. That definitely wasn't a good sign, Allen thought as he quickly placed his gaze on Kanda. However the expression on Kanda's face was quite different from the last time an event almost identical to this had taken place. This time Kanda's eye was twitching in annoyance.

"I was just wondering...." Lavi started off, a mischievous grin now plastered to his face.

"Well, I was just thinking that...well you never go into the baths well anyone else is there, probably because you're shy of your arm I guess, so nobody really knows.....but I was just sorta curious since you see...well, Allen, your hair is whi-"

"No. Just NO! We are definitely not doing this AGAIN!" Kanda's immensely pissed off voice cut Lavi off.

"But Yuuuuu-chaaaan! I wanna know what colour they are!" Lavi pouted.

"Oh for fuck's sake! They're white. Are you happy now retard!?" It was time for Lenalee to but in.

"But Kanda, however do you know what colour Allen-kun's pubes are?" Lenalee had the cruelest smile on her face as she looked at Kanda expectantly.

"...Wild guess?" Kanda had a feeling that wouldn't be a satisfactory answer, he was proven correct when Lenalee arched an eyebrow at him as if to say, 'Oh please, as if that's true.'

"Ugh, Lenalee you stupid, conniving..." His voice trailed off for a moment as several choice words could scarcely be heard coming from under his breath.

"You know damn well why I know that sort of thing!"

"Hmm, I don't believe I do Kanda and neither do the rest of us, please do enlighten all of us." Kanda just ground his teeth before muttering a barely audible,

"Oh fuck it!" And it was with that he walked over to his bean, grabbed him a planted an incredibly hot open-mouthed kiss on his lips. The cafeteria gave a collective gasp.

"Oi, Moyashi?"

"Nnn, yah baKanda?"

"We're leaving now." The Japanese swordsman smirked against Allen's lips, as he watched the brief flash of confusion in the bean's eyes turn into understanding.

"I think that's probably one of the best ideas you've had in a while." And with that Kanda and Allen quickly left the cafeteria leaving everyone flustered. And one confused.

"....W-where are those t-two going?" A shy and slightly distraught Miranda asked. To which Timothy and Lavi answered in unison;

"They're doing the noooo pants dance!" And Lenalee there after translated as;

"They're gonna have hot 'n' steamy **sex**!" And Miranda passed out.

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**AN: It's officially over. I feel very proud of actually finishing this and how it turned out...but at the same time I'm very sad to have it end, I kinda just want to keep writing this story as long as I can. However I won't because it would get boring, so now I'm moving on to my new story ....I still don't have a name for it buuut it will be kinda dark, although it will still have elements of my weird and apparently appreciated sense of humor! It will (of course) be Yullen and it will be 'M' rated....I'm gonna write 'teh dirty' /// **

**Anyways thanks all of you for sticking with me through this experience and being so great! Thanks so much for all the reviews, faves, and alerts! I hope you all enjoyed it and will stick around to read my new stuff!**

**Til' next time, I love you guys! **

**~byes  
**


	11. Second Epilogue The Stalker

**Chapter 11: The Second Epilogue - The Stalker**

**Why hello there! It's been a while.**

**...Chances are you're angry at me. That's understandable. I have been gone for a little over two years.**

**Since I've lost track of all my excuses for not updating I'm not going to bother making any. I will, however, apologize for the lack of me... that somehow makes me feel conceited.**

**Anyways, I'm sorry for not being on here in over two years. My bad.  
**

**So about this chapter! This is going to be based off of a character that I very briefly introduced in Chapter 8. Christie is her name; or Chrinkle as Kanda liked to call her.**

**This chapter will be about Allen, Kanda and the magnificently disfunctional relationship I built for them two years ago, but it will also be about Christie. Christie, it turns out, has been stalking Kanda since chapter eight. She's pretty well psycho and somehow managed to get into the Black Order. I didn't know how she did it, so I didn't write about it.**

**Also, since I've not been keeping up with DGM recently, Allen will be inside the building of the Black Order still. Sorry for the inconvenience**

**On with the chapter!**

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Allen walked down the halls of the Black Order cautiously. There were goosebumps on his skin and a nervous sweat that he just couldn't shake. It had been this way for a few days and Allen was starting to get worried.

The halls were empty save for a small group of finders he had walked past a couple minutes ago, they had been laughing at one particular finder amongst the group who had accidentally washed his finder robes with a red sweater he wore during the holiday season. He was now sporting quite the lovely "salmon" coloured garb. In all fairness the colour did suit his complexion quite nicely.

After them Allen hadn't seen anybody else. It was late and he was walking in the parts of the castle that no one inhabited so it was no wonder that he was alone. As a matter of fact, he expected to be alone. Why was it then, that he couldn't shake the feeling of being followed.

Another twenty or so minutes went by before Allen hit a dead end and decided to turn around and head back to his room. If he was being perfectly honest, Allen was grateful for the excuse to return. The feeling that he was being watched was haunting him. Turning to face the direction he had came Allen quickly scanned the stretch of hall before him. His eyes twitched quickly back and forth; his imagination rapidly turning harmless shadows into vicious demons.

He shook his head and sharply inhaled the breath he hadn't realized he'd been keeping. Before he could dwell on those disturbing thoughts any longer, he began to take long strides in the direction of his room.

Passing numerous paintings and sculptures, most of which were of nude people, Allen kept on walking. His heart was pounding in his chest and he could hear the blood thumping in his ears. For some reason he was becoming more and more overcome with panic. Dread was forcing his steps to quicken, pumping adrenaline into his muscles.

All his senses had become overly alert and perhaps it was because of this that he heard the slightly out of place footsteps. They had been just a millisecond off of his own. At first he doubted that this wasn't just a trick of his imagination but he over ruled that thought almost immediately and began to run as fast as his legs could carry him. It also never occurred to him that the reason he only just heard this difference could have been that the footsteps were from someone who had just come from one of the corridors or rooms along the hall and said person had never intended for their footsteps to match the pace of Allen's own in the first place.

However, Allen was now certain that it wasn't just his imagination; as he had started running the foreign footsteps had given up trying to be discreet and were now chasing after him. Whoever was following him was determined to catch up to him. Allen didn't dare turn around to take a look, lest it should cause him to slow down or lose his balance.

His breaths were coming out in ragged gasps as he tried to suck the oxygen into his body, even though his lungs felt tight. A cramp was growing in his side too, just under his right rib cage. Despite all this Allen kicked it up a gear. The footsteps were getting louder- closer. The stranger was gaining on him.

"Jesus Christ! Beansprout, will you stop running!"

Allen kept running for a moment; the words not quite registering in his mind. Suddenly he came to an abrupt stop. Apparently Kanda had gotten through to him.

Kanda jogged up to the side of the bent over and panting form of Allen Walker.

"Why the hell did you start running like that! I was coming to find you to tell you about a mission tomorrow. It's going to take at least a week and we're going with Lenalee so I figure we should probably head to bed now and start...uh..._preparing_ for a whole week of celebacy." Kanda paused for a moment. It really didn't seem like Allen was paying any attention.

"Oi, Bean- did you hear even a word I just said?"

Silence. Kanda looked down at Allen, ready to glare at him and begin yelling, but Allen was simply staring straight ahead of him his face paler than usual. The taller exorcist turned his head in the direction of whatever he had lost Allen's concentration to.

It took a moment for Kanda's mind to supply a memory to go with the face he was gazing at, but when it did Kanda felt his eyes twitch ever so slightly.

"Chrinkle." He stated dryly, suddenly feeling very bored and annoyed.

"It's Christie. But I'm so glad you remember me Kanda-bear!"

"What did you just call me bitc-" At the sound of Kanda's bad manners (even towards a blatantly crazy woman) Allen came back to his senses. He whipped his head around (and up) to look at Kanda, a look of bewilderment on his face.

"Kanda...I think you're being stalked." Allen was feeling rather amazed but not in one of those positive ways. It was more of a, '_holy crap I can't believe this is actually happening_' sort of amazed.

Kanda rolled his eyes dramatically and gave a small huff, because being stalked was _so_ not a big deal.

"Kanda-bear! Pay attention to **me** not that weird, little, albino harlot!" Christie stamped her foot, as this clearly makes people get their way - always. Unfortunately for Christie, Kanda and Allen were ignoring her and had entered into an argument about something or other, probably Kanda's manners and/or mannerisms.

Christie didn't know what to do! She was always the centre of attention. She had to be! So she did the only thing she could think of to get the focus put back on her; Christie screamed.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Though she was successful in gaining the full attention of Kanda and his albino whore she was also successful in waking and alerting most of the Black Order.

Soon everyone was rushing towards them in a mad frenzy. This was bad for Christie who was not only guilty of breaking and entering but for stalking as well. Sadly Christie wasn't the brightest girl in the world and instead of trying to run while she could, she merely felt delighted at all the attention that was about to be bestowed upon her.

It wasn't until a few hours later, while sitting in her cell within the dungeon of the Black Order, that Christie realized that breaking into this building had perhaps not been her best idea. She should of known that though, especially after her last run in with the po-po. Oh well, live and ..._don't_ learn. However, Christie was an optimist (as well as a nut job) and now all she could think about was how wonderfully close she would now be to her darling dear.

"Just think," said Christie to herself, "Kanda-bear will be so excited when he hears what this lovely organization has decided."

Of course Christie was referring to the decision, that had been left to Komui of all people, to keep Christie on board as a medical professional. They did need nurses after all and that just happened to be what Christie was trained as. Sure it was meant to be a punishment, one that most within the order would consider worse than a year or two of prison, but to Christie it was a blessing. That night Christie knew she would sleep wonderfully, dreaming of her new home and her dear Kanda-bear.

~~~o~~~A week and a half later~~~o~~~

Kanda's mind was blurry and his thoughts felt thick and sluggish as they worked through his brain. He was trying to recall what he could of the mission. It had gone well, except for the injuries he had apparently sustained. His rejuvenating abilities were slowing down, seemingly coming to a halt.

They had managed to get the innocence, that he was sure of, but when had he gotten hurt? His mind kept trying to draw on the memories of that night. There were little fragments of memory scattered across his subconscious and he supposed one of them was from when he'd been attacked. Finally the memory came to him. They had all been walking back with the innocence thinking that they had been successful, when an akuma caught them by surprise. Kanda had run with the innocence and the akuma had followed him...right off a cliff. 'Of course I jumped off a cliff...' thought Kanda, rolling his eyes at himself, internally.

It was then that he woke from the dream like state his mind was in, his eyes remained closed as he slowly changed over from sleep to reality. He lay there for a moment feeling the breeze against his...

...Where the hell were his pants?

Kanda's eyes flew open. He was laying on his back looking up at a sterile white ceiling. He had been here enough times to know where he was. From the smell alone he knew he was in the Black Order infirmary and judging from the small crack on the third tile from the right directly above him, he was in room seven.

Just as he was coming to terms with where exactly he was a cold hand brought him back to reality and, in Kanda's honest opinion, hell.

"Kanda-bear! I'm so glad you're awake, I was beginning to get worried!" Kanda felt a small part of him die, when he heard Chrinlin's voice.

"Why the hell are you here Chris Chringle! And what the _hell_ do you think you're grabbing!" yelled Kanda.

Then suddenly, with a noticeable flourish, Allen threw open the door to room seven. He struck what he thought to be a heroic pose, though in all reality it kind of made him look girly, what with his hands on his hips like that. And then, in the most dignified tone he could muster Allen cried out,

"Get your filthy hands off my boyfriend's dingle berries you crazy ass stalker!"

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**The End**

**Maybe.**

**Maybe not. I might just make a third ending for this in another two years.**

**Thanks for reading!**

**8D**


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